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# Statistics
Favourites: 13; Deviations: 10; Watchers: 1
Watching: 2; Pageviews: 1899; Comments Made: 189; Friends: 2
# Comments
Comments: 74
Miss-Twila [2013-12-14 22:22:04 +0000 UTC]
Hey there long time no see, I got all the quotes for a Whitney mod done and I've just sent them toΒ Foxygene Β ^^
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Audiuz In reply to Miss-Twila [2014-03-23 16:34:55 +0000 UTC]
Ah, that's great! I've been away for quite some time now and I just managed to get back. But back on the day I thought you had forgotten about me. xD
Anyway, hope to see this done soon, if it hasn't already. I know it'll be great.Β
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Miss-Twila In reply to Audiuz [2014-03-23 16:38:56 +0000 UTC]
Nah guy I couldnt forget about you, you one of the few people that have expressed such love for my character <3
I will link it to you once its finished ^^
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Agent-Pumpkin [2013-10-29 23:40:05 +0000 UTC]
Oi - search for me again. This time, with robyn.jaegerΒ
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Audiuz In reply to Agent-Pumpkin [2013-10-29 23:52:10 +0000 UTC]
Alright. Found and added to contacts.
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Agent-Pumpkin In reply to Audiuz [2013-10-29 23:54:20 +0000 UTC]
Are you sure? I haven't received a request.
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Audiuz In reply to Agent-Pumpkin [2013-10-29 23:58:01 +0000 UTC]
I found the shadowy robyn, yes. And I'm pretty sure I sent a contact request...
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Audiuz In reply to Agent-Pumpkin [2013-10-29 22:09:03 +0000 UTC]
I'm sorry. Answer what? I don't think I received any message from you...
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Agent-Pumpkin In reply to Audiuz [2013-10-29 22:10:28 +0000 UTC]
Oh, it Doesnt matter then. No worries.
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Audiuz In reply to Agent-Pumpkin [2013-10-29 22:12:08 +0000 UTC]
You mean that thing about the "No no no no no"?
C'mon, tell me!
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Agent-Pumpkin In reply to Audiuz [2013-10-29 22:18:04 +0000 UTC]
Yeah, I sent a message regarding the issue. But if you never got it, it Doesnt matter. ^^
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Audiuz In reply to Agent-Pumpkin [2013-10-29 22:28:02 +0000 UTC]
*Looks at inbox* Oh there's the message. Why the hell didn't I receive a new message notification?! -.-
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Agent-Pumpkin In reply to Audiuz [2013-10-29 22:32:40 +0000 UTC]
Reply on there. I really need to vent.
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Audiuz In reply to Agent-Pumpkin [2013-10-29 22:34:40 +0000 UTC]
I replied. If you wish we can talk through skype aswell. More real time - fast replies.
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Agent-Pumpkin In reply to Audiuz [2013-10-29 22:35:38 +0000 UTC]
Yeah, do that - gimme your Skype!
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Audiuz In reply to Agent-Pumpkin [2013-10-29 22:37:33 +0000 UTC]
I use my microsoft account for skype. Basically, my e-mail. And that is menezes.filipe@hotmail.com. Search for Fillipe Soares de Menezes.
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Audiuz In reply to Agent-Pumpkin [2013-10-29 22:41:32 +0000 UTC]
I'll be waiting for the request.
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Agent-Pumpkin In reply to Audiuz [2013-10-29 22:43:07 +0000 UTC]
Which one are ya?! There TONNES with the same name, and loads of them are from Brazil! ;A;
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Audiuz In reply to Agent-Pumpkin [2013-10-29 22:48:42 +0000 UTC]
Hmm... Did you try to search by the e-mail I sent you? My picture is black and white - of an anime girl.
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Agent-Pumpkin In reply to Audiuz [2013-10-29 22:50:10 +0000 UTC]
I'll try again, with that email.Β
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Audiuz In reply to Agent-Pumpkin [2013-10-29 22:52:28 +0000 UTC]
If you can't find it perhaps you can send me yours and I can try searching?
Ps: The girl in the picture has yellow eyes despite the picture being black and white.
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Agent-Pumpkin In reply to Audiuz [2013-10-29 22:54:19 +0000 UTC]
Nah, I can't find it - as for mine, search for jess.jess1997 - if that fails, search for "Robyn" - there'll be a picture of a 'shadow' of Robyn, with only her eyes showing, alongside blood, because, well, I'm a delightful person.
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Audiuz In reply to Agent-Pumpkin [2013-10-29 22:59:22 +0000 UTC]
I only see a picture of Robyn smiling and I see no Shadow. But since it's one of your drawings I assume it's you.
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Agent-Pumpkin In reply to Audiuz [2013-10-29 23:00:29 +0000 UTC]
No, it's a black image of her, so it's shadowy - and yes, it's me.
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Audiuz In reply to Agent-Pumpkin [2013-10-29 23:08:05 +0000 UTC]
Nope. I only found one with this image:Β agent-pumpkin.deviantart.com/aβ¦
And added to contacts.
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Agent-Pumpkin In reply to Audiuz [2013-10-29 23:10:53 +0000 UTC]
Nope, didn't get a request. >.<''
I'll have to change my Skype name again; it's doing my head in. Wait a while - I'll send you another request if I can ever get it fixed up; for now, please talk to me on Tumblr.
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Audiuz In reply to Agent-Pumpkin [2013-10-29 23:17:39 +0000 UTC]
If it helps, your sister has me added on her skype. Perhaps you can search on her contacts list or something.
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Agent-Pumpkin In reply to Audiuz [2013-10-29 23:18:01 +0000 UTC]
Hmm, perhaps you're right there. ^^
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Agent-Pumpkin [2013-09-22 16:28:29 +0000 UTC]
About my issue... I think one of my RPs is making me kinda sad... but I don't want to end it to have them disappointed in me, or it ending...
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Audiuz In reply to Agent-Pumpkin [2013-09-22 19:41:21 +0000 UTC]
I see. Well, I've been through the same thing before. I think its part of roleplaying, much like real life, sad things happen, as in roleplaying you're basically living through someone else's eyes. If you think you can, either through RPing or not, tell the person that the situation is making you sad. Those situations happen, I know, some can't be avoided, but there are things you can do to make them pass without hurting you. If you know something that you can do, do it.
I've been through that situation many times, I understand. But don't let it get the best of you. Stand strong, my friend.
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Agent-Pumpkin In reply to Audiuz [2013-09-22 19:45:47 +0000 UTC]
I just feel trapped in it because I feel as if I owe it to the person as they did an RP for me before this RP. I can't even explain how devastatingly selfish I would feel if I stopped it... But at the same time, I just want to go to our old one, because that one made us BOTH happy... And I don't blame them either, a lot of the negative things were brought in BY me... But executed with them acting on it as well, I Didnt realise how alone and upset it would make me feel...
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Audiuz In reply to Agent-Pumpkin [2013-09-22 20:21:03 +0000 UTC]
Tell them how you feel, tell them that it is making you sad. If simply continuing is making you feel worser and worser, don't continue. It's hard, but tell them that. They might understand you, they might make you feel better. It may sound that you are being selfish, it may even be true, but considering my knowledge of everyone that you talk to, they won't mind, because they know the wonderful person that you are, and know that you wouldn't do something "selfish" if it wasn't important.
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Agent-Pumpkin In reply to Audiuz [2013-09-22 20:25:45 +0000 UTC]
Yeah... you're right... I have no idea why I feel so obligated to making others feel happy, even when it makes me feel like crap; I always seem to punish myself that way, and I don't understand WHY. If I could just make sense of it somehow... and figure out why I do that, and then change it... well...
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Audiuz In reply to Agent-Pumpkin [2013-09-22 20:49:08 +0000 UTC]
I am exactly the same. I want to make everyone happy, no matter if I feel horrible because of it. But I do it because I like to do it.Β
To see other because smile, and know that it was because of me, is one of the greatest feelings I've ever felt, it may even seem selfish talking that way.
I've been thanked, received bows, I was called a selfless person by alot of people. I don't know, you might be the same.
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Agent-Pumpkin In reply to Audiuz [2013-09-22 20:54:21 +0000 UTC]
I think my issue is more guilt. I didn't realise it when making Robyn, but she has an issue with guilt, and I'm thinking that so do I. I can't do anything (hardly) without feeling guilty, and I can't make myself happy without having somebody happy with me. That was why our (I won't name them) previous RP worked so well; both parties were very happy, and so I felt safe to BE happy. But this RP is just... ruining me a little bit, and making me really miserable... but I know I'll regret ending it. At least... I think I do... I think so...
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Audiuz In reply to Agent-Pumpkin [2013-09-22 21:09:50 +0000 UTC]
Hmm, yep, situations like this happen and ending them might be the best course of action, staying like this obviously isn't doing any good, being insecure is normal, I myself am insecure all the time, as you might have noticed already. But in my opinion, tell insecurity to go **** herself and do it. I'm not saying you should do reckless things, but I hope you get my point. You have your friends, that you can talk to whenever you are feeling down, talk to them as many times as you need to, they will be glad to talk to you, and even more happier knowing that you are sharing your problems with them. Like you are doing right now, you are talking with me. People are here for you, I am here for you. We are friends.
I am sorry it this was or sounded too sentimental. I'm normally not good when talking about this. Doesn't mean you should stop talking!
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Agent-Pumpkin In reply to Audiuz [2013-09-22 21:27:05 +0000 UTC]
The only thing that strikes me is annoying people; I am often unhappy (I generally find it hard to be happy anyways - I always managed before though, it was never drastic - I've never been taking action against myself either, nor have I ever been suicidal) and find myself a burden to those around me, as they are always the ones to pick up the pieces. It's funny, because I'm the one that gives out all the "best advice" (so quoted by a lot of people anyhow), and yet I struggle to follow it myself... which makes me feel hypocritical, even though I'm typically not a hypocritical person. It's tough. There's just no balance for me.
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Audiuz In reply to Agent-Pumpkin [2013-09-22 22:02:52 +0000 UTC]
Your words describe myself perfectly, I'm not lying or just doing the "trying to make you feel better" thing. I'm telling the truth, I feel exactly the same. I feel as a burden to those around me yet I'm the one helping all the time.Β I've never been suicidal either, quite the contrary, I like to live, to see people smile at something good that I did. Overall, I like to help, alot, in any way I can, as many times as needed and more despite everything else. Feeling happy, even if for a little while, helps me to combat the constant sadness that I feel.
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Agent-Pumpkin In reply to Audiuz [2013-09-22 22:06:55 +0000 UTC]
I'm just stuck in a pit of loneliness; it sounds like an exaggeration, but trust me, it's not... I can't even bring myself to smile any more, even out of pity for others when they worry about me. I actually just feel like crying; my eyes are kinda blurry as I'm sending this message; it isn't to get you to feel sorry for me, I'm really just talking, because I like to feel as if I'm doing something.
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Audiuz In reply to Agent-Pumpkin [2013-09-22 22:37:22 +0000 UTC]
I'm not sure what to say, which makes me feel useless in a situation where I want to help someone. Talking in a language that isn't my native one makes it even harder for me because I can't use some words that I normally would. Don't take as making me worry for you as something negative, it is something positive, I worry about you because I care about you. If you want to cry, do it. My shoulder is right here, even if digitally, people have to cry, don't force the emotion inside you.
Talking to you about this made me realise that I am not the only one feeling eternally lonely no matter how many people are around me, I am not the only one feeling unhappy no matter how much I work towards it. This makes me kinda happy. Don't get me wrong, I don't mean I'm happy for other people's... suffering.
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Audiuz [2013-09-21 17:31:55 +0000 UTC]
My dog, which was with me since I was 5, died today. Goodbye, dearest friend.
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Audiuz In reply to Agent-Pumpkin [2013-09-13 18:28:51 +0000 UTC]
Hello there. I'm kinda tired but good overall. How about you? ^^
Sorry for the delay in answering, I've been busy.
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Agent-Pumpkin In reply to Audiuz [2013-09-13 18:45:14 +0000 UTC]
Im good, well, figuratively. Im glad to hear you're doing well.
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Agent-Pumpkin In reply to Audiuz [2013-09-13 19:23:16 +0000 UTC]
Nothing much - I'm really too irritated to have anything going on. I'm trying to find roleplayers to keep me occupied though - and Tumblr's helping me distract myself from the annoyance too. Which is great; I'm having far too much fun with then Shadow account (yep, the shadow-servant character for Maxwell, I have a Tumblr for him)
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Audiuz In reply to Agent-Pumpkin [2013-09-13 19:30:56 +0000 UTC]
Aww. *Pats* I don't think I saw shadow yet. Might take a look. ^^
Why don't you help me create a personality for my don't starve oc? So I can rp moar, haha. I will finish what I'm doing and we can begin if you accept. ^^
You can share your worries with me if you feel like it, anytime. Hope that didn't sound awkward.
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