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chase123 — 1. All hell breaks loose
Published: 2008-09-24 20:45:23 +0000 UTC; Views: 767; Favourites: 11; Downloads: 10
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Description Fire that’s all she saw and remembered before waking up in a graveyard right in front of someone’s grave.  She had to squint her glowing green eyes to see the name and when she realized whose name it was she freaked out and fell over. “What the hell im alive im not dead this cant be right.” She said getting up and tripping over her large red cape she growled a bit out of annoyance and then wondered where the hell she got a cape from. She was wearing a traditional spawn outfit the only difference was that she had odd tendril like hair coming from her head and she screamed in horror when she realized that it was in fact her name on the grave and the inscription on the grave said ‘here lies a beloved big sister and a beloved wife.” At the end of it the inscription said’ may winona rest in peace” Winona was now in deep shock and she couldn’t see the date in which she died at all and she was about to smash the tombstone to pieces if she hadn’t heard a shuffling noise behind her Then she felt somebody’s hand on her shoulder and when she turned around she noticed three people.
One of them had long brown hair with a red and black stripe which was in a pony tail at the moment. She also had dark blue glasses over her light brown eyes that seemed a bit hypnotic if you looked into her eyes for to long. She was also wearing a short sleeved button up shirt that was completely gray in color. She was also wearing dark blue jeans that had the trade mark sign of dickies on it and she also noticed that the girl looked around 5’3.The only thing winona would not have noticed till later on was that the girl had tattoos of 3 skulls on the back of her neck. The girl was pretty much looking at Winona in shock. Winona could have sworn she had met all 3 of these people before but she didn’t remember.
The second girl has short burgundy colored hair and it appeared as if she had shampooed and conditioned her hair because it was extremely shiny. The girl was wearing what appeared to be a very dress that was as black as night and the sleeves on the dress were covering one of her hands as the other hand was on Winona’s shoulder. The girl’s eyes had black eye shadow and the color of her eyes was a dark brown. The thing was you could tell she had been crying because the cross that was on her neck was wet with tears. The last thing Winona noticed about the girl was that she had a green lizard sitting on her shoulder.
The third and final girl had brownish hair and it was braided and it stopped at her shoulders. She had this blank ass stare on her face her eyes were brown and she seemed to have a cut on the side of her cheek. She had a pair of black pants that had what appeared to be a message saying fuck off. The shirt that she was wearing was blood red in color and it was very sparkly and Winona couldn’t help but stare at the damned shirt. This girl wore absolutely no make up at all and seemed at some point shocked at the mere sight of Winona.
“Who the hell are you?” Winona said moving away from all three girls and jumping into an apple tree and glaring down at the three girls as if they were animals. One of the girls was about to speak when all of a sudden the clouds turned black and it started to thunder a lot. Then a huge explosion had happened in the middle of New York City and after a few seconds came screams of terror. Several beings around the city were suddenly alert and watching as all hell had broke loose and this was just the beginning of everyone’s troubles.
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Comments: 7

xPWRA [2010-07-04 16:04:18 +0000 UTC]

So great, so perfect, I love it!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

chase123 In reply to xPWRA [2010-07-06 02:47:23 +0000 UTC]

Thanks but the thing Is im not sure on weather to continue or give up on it.One pperson said that my writing bored them to death..It was said in a chatroom

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

xPWRA In reply to chase123 [2010-07-06 11:13:24 +0000 UTC]

Well, it always depends on everyone's idea, I think you shouldn't listen to them, if you like to write, then, go ahead, write!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

darkrosefairy77 [2009-07-07 05:33:22 +0000 UTC]

just a thought, try to avoid repetitive phrases such as "it appeared to be" or "she was also wearing." use commas, and go out of your way to describe in new ways instead of using the same phrases over and over. It helps alot with the flow

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

chase123 In reply to darkrosefairy77 [2009-07-07 08:21:39 +0000 UTC]

O///////O thanks ill surely do that

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Raxoon [2008-09-25 12:24:57 +0000 UTC]

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chase123 In reply to Raxoon [2008-09-25 22:12:59 +0000 UTC]

yea i had to litterlly do some major thinking to get you dressed right in this chapter

👍: 0 ⏩: 0