HOME | DD
Chearth — into the water
Published: 2012-05-04 13:09:41 +0000 UTC; Views: 478; Favourites: 40; Downloads: 5
Redirect to original
Description
my oc Vivid x3Related content
Comments: 22
Critique, like you asked. c:
Vision: Vision can either be strong meaning, or somewhat of a story behind the piece. In this case, it could be either, since eI'm no his as interpreting, but I do like how a subtle story is implied. Good job! d(ouo)
Originality:While i have seen pictures of characters falling into water before, or laying down, you execution is pretty good.I definitely haven't seen many pieces like this one.
Technique: Time to get into the nitty-gritty of things! Like most of my technique-based critiques, lets start with anatomy. While your anatomy is pretty much spot on, there are still a few areas that bother me. One, her arms/fingers. Her arms look like twigs, to put it bluntly. Not because they're thin, which is normal, they have no curve to them indicating a fold in the flesh, or the curve of an arm muscle. They're pretty much just straight lines. Which looks really unnatural. They kind of look a bit long, too. Two, her fingers. While you have the perspective dead-on, her fingers are far too thin, and almost look like they're made of wood in the sense that they kind of curve unnaturally in places. Finally, her feet. While the one on the bent leg looks fine, the other kind of looks foot-ball shaped, and curves to the side for some reason. Since Vivid looks like she's falling, it would look better to have her foot facing up, not to the side, same goes for the rest of her leg. Oh, and her neck is... a tad thin, but that's it for anatomy. Everything else looks fine.
Shading, shading shading. You have it down pretty much fine. You seem to have a good grasp on light sources, and how they cast shadows, light, etc. The problem? Your cel-shading looks shaky in some places (Such as in some locks of Vivid's hair). Try to work on making those lines of shading smoother. Your highlights really bother me as well. They're just little dots. Highlights are more than just dots. Much like shadows, they have distinct shapes to them, depending on what they're reflecting off of.
Your clothing looks fine, but... while I'm not entirely sure what material she's wearing (I am aware that in she spots, it's metallic armor), it's severely lacking in folds.
Finally, the water. I like how you made the background bend a bit, to indicate the refraction made by the water, you didn't indicate the water itself. Theres no highlights, no waves, no other reflections, etc. It kind of looks like she's falling onto an oddly shaped floor, and probably would have assumed that if the title didn't tell me otherwise.
Impact: While this is an overall nice piece, and it does create a mood, the rest is pretty much dead. She has a dead expression, there's not much movement, the colors don't mesh too well, etc. It all ads up to a really dead-looking piece that leaves little emotional impact, which is really kind of tragic. Sorry to be harsh, but it's true.
Hope my critique was helpful! Talk to you soon! e.deviantart.net/emoticons/l/l… " width="19" height="19" alt="
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
This critique is realy helpful
thank you so much
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
You're welcome so much!
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Hello!! Nice pic ;u;e.deviantart.net/emoticons/b/b… " width="10" height="10" alt="
- The anatomy is mainly correct.
- The water effect under her is awesome.
- The shading looks so nice!
- You did a great job on her boots, the feet's shape is well done too.e.deviantart.net/emoticons/b/b… " width="10" height="10" alt="
- It looks like she's lying on the water's surface, and not "Into the water" like you said.
- We can't know if those feathers are floating in the water, but it seems more they're flying. It looks impossible to know.
- Her right leg is longer than the other, which would anyways be shorter if it's down.
- Her arms are too much straight.
- This girl has too less hair!! Make more the next time.
- The eyes' shading is missing. I can barely imagine her pupil.
I hope I wasn't too strict e.deviantart.net/emoticons/a/a… " width="19" height="19" alt="
If I was forgive me e.deviantart.net/emoticons/f/f… " width="15" height="15" alt="
I wish you to imrpove with your art!!!
=LenaDashii
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
You're alive again, Cookie? I'm glad!! What happened to you? :/
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
yes I am 
I'll send you a note ^^
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
