HOME | DD

Description
An unavoidable bit of fanart from a RP. Turkey baster vs mechanical arm. Which will win?

Captain Anne belongs to Artoveli

Behind them, the reel came to an end with a final, drawn-out note on the fiddle and a few loud thumps on the plastic tubs. Everybody cheered and clapped, and there was laughter all around. Anne and Rover also stopped with the music, and she wiped her brow with a sleeve.

“Whew! That is one high-energy dance!” She said.

Rover was trying valiantly to hide the fact that he too was quite out of breath. His cheeks and ears were red from the exertion but his grin never wavered. "It's a chipper one for sure. It was fine to have such a quick study as a dance pardner." He put a hand to the stitch in his side. "That cook of yours got some fiddlin' arm, don't she?"

“Why, thank you, sir.” Anne replied, with a bow of exaggerated formality. “That was a lot of fun. I... haven’t gotten to dance with a partner in a long time, either.” She realized as soon as she said it that it wasn’t exactly what Rover had said, and she tried to back-peddal. “Sorry, I don’t mean either, I mean... period.” Her cheeks became a little pinker.

Rover's brows raised at her first comment but he grew a smile that ended in an amused chuckle as he watched her struggle to fix it. He patted her on the shoulder. "Don't strain yourself, darlin. I know what you meant."

Anne furrowed her brow and smiled uncertainly. Being pat on the shoulder just made her blush more, and she couldn’t put her finger on exactly why. One thing was sure, though- she needed water! Stepping over to the table she’d been sitting at before, she picked up her cup and was disappointed to see that it only had a drop left. She saw that the pitcher was empty too. Picking it up, she turned and started heading for the kitchen.

“I’ll be back, with water.” She said as she passed Rover.

"I'll carry that for ya." Rover insisted, taking the pitcher from her and following her

“Uh- It- Ookay.” Anne said, surprised, as he pulled the pitcher from her hand.

Then she paused, registering the smell for the first time. She saw Sadie pushing her way purposefully through the crowd that had gathered at the counter. “Oh boy.”

Sadie entered the kitchen and placed her hands on her hips. “Well! ‘Ere’s an ‘owdy-do, luh!” She walked over to the oven and watched as Nana pulled out the latest tray. “Yer not half brazen!” Then she looked at the buns themselves, and her demeanor settled a little. She plucked a metal chopstick from a nearby tray and tapped the top of one of the buns experimentally, appraising the crust and the springback. Satisfied, she looked at Nana. “But I’ll admit, you knows what yer at.”

When they got to the kitchen- not stopping at the counter but going straight in, since they were after water- they found both of their cooks in congenial conference.

“Land sakes, me dear, ‘ow does you get dat texture jes right?” Sadie asked, poking at a fragment of bun that she held in her hand.

Nana pulled a little pouch from under her shirt, opened it and took a pinch of a lavender powder to show her. She wiggled her fingers and it became a little hovering cloud for a moment before slowly floating toward the ground. "Cloud flower. Good for bread. Just a little."

“Land sakes...” Sadie murmured, putting out her hand to catch the falling flour, and peering at it in fascination.

Anne stepped up to them, hesitantly. “Everything... alright?”

Sadie looked up at Anne. “Oh, Captain! You must be here- in my kitchen- for to git a start on them dishes, eh? Can’t tink why else yous’d be back here!” She grinned, one fist on her hip as she sat on a stool next to Nana.

Anne held up her hands. “We’re just here for water!”

“Ohh no ye don’t, dere’s a water spigot out on the counter and you knows it. Yous two came inside a my kitchen, an’ you knows the rules!”

“I just wanted to check and see if everything was okay.”

“Fine! We’s havin’ a fine time back here, luv, as ye kin plainly see! Now, you and yer gentleman friend best roll up your sleeves and get to work.”

“But... I’m the captain.” Anne said lamely.

“Yes, a course you are, me luv!” Sadie nodded. “Everywheres else on dis ship.”

“Oooh...” Anne started rolling up a sleeve. She was pretty sure Sadie wouldn’t have pulled this on the other captain. Something occurred to her. “Rover’s got a metal arm!”

“Sure I’s heard dem all now!” Sadie shook her head at Nana. “Does you ‘affta deal with dis kind of backtalk in your kitchen, too?”

Anne continued rolling up her sleeves, and turned to Rover. “You don’t have to wash any dishes. Get out, while you still can!”

Nana nodded sagely. "Always trouble. always. Go serve, yes?" She pulled one of the trays.

Rover rolled up both sleeves. "wash or dry?"

“I can’t believe this.” Anne said, blushing furiously as she handed Rover a wet casserole dish. “You come here as a guest and you wind up washing dishes. There’s something about Sadie!” She stopped scrubbing and gestured emphatically with both hands. “I can put my foot down with everyone else on this crew, but I can’t seem to stand up to Sadie Braff!” She grabbed the sponge and went back to work. “Land sakes.” She muttered.

Rover burst out laughing. "It's a cook thing, I reckon. Nobody tells Nana what to do. An’ boy, she will crack ya in the shins if ya don’t clean yer plate." He clutched the towel in his fist and rotated his hand at the wrist, spinning the towel and drying the thing in less than a second.

“Maybe that’s it, then!” Anne said, running more hot water. She started tossing cutlery into the rinse basin as she washed them, piece by piece. “So... You’ve seen a lot of Westerns? I’ve only seen a couple in my life: Back to the Future III, and Fievel Goes West. I’m... not sure how much either of those count, really... And actually, we don’t really watch Fievel anymore, on account of one of the villains being a spider... A bit insensitive, with Pie on the crew now.” She grabbed a fistful of rinsed cutlery and shook it out, before dumping it into the drying rack for Rover. “So my question is- Got any recommendations? Chances are good that we’d have most of them in our own movie archive.” She looked at him. “Movies are... kind of big where we come from. Every ship in the fleet is named after a classic. ‘Casablanca’ is the name of an old black-and-white movie... that I have yet to see...” She murmured this last part, a bit embarrassed. She knew she should probably see the movie her ship was named after. She meant to- it was on her to-do list! But a lot of things were on her to-do list.

"'fraid I'm only familiar with the mouse one." Rover said with a bit of a chuckle. "An’ it's on here..." He tapped the little pendant under his shirt. "So I reckon it counts. With the kiddos, probably might want to steer clear of John Wayne, gets a mite gritty. Anything with Gene Autry, Roy Rogers or Slim Danger ought to do ya good. I lean towards preferin' the likes of Slim, myself."

Anne’s face lit up. “No kidding- You have Fievel Goes West on that thing?? I mean, we can’t watch it now, but Rand and I must have seen that thing a million times as kids! I still get the songs stuck in my head sometimes!” She was grinning ear to ear as she went to work on the next casserole dish. “Slim Danger, huh? I don’t recognize the name off the top of my head, but I’ll search the guide and see what comes up!”

"It's a good'n. I'll have to show ya. 'Bout a sheriff of this little town, an' all the folk that live 'round. Townsfolk, visitors, Indians. Slim, why, he's the toughest, bravest and all round nicest fellah you ever saw. An' his gal Bessy...Purdy thing..." He cleared his throat. "Not as purdy as some starship captains, though, I reckon." He suddenly was very intent on drying the dish in his hands.

Anne did nooooot know what to say to that. So, in lieu of speech, and without giving it much thought, she dipped the slotted spoon she had just washed into the rinse basin, and splashed him.

Rover didn't look over but his brows shot straight up in surprise. Well, it wasn't a slap in the face. a little grin slid up one side of his face and as he was drying the next item he deliberately dipped the edge of his spinning towel in the water, splashing her back.

Anne saw it coming, but too late. “Abph!” She sputtered, and held up her arm to shield her face. “Oh yeeeah?” She said, a little evilly, as she brought a turkey baster up out of the dishwater. What a turkey baster had to do with casserole, Sadie alone knew. Anne submerged it in the rinse basin and filled it up. She squinted at Rover. “Alright, Pilgrim, draw.”

Rover squinted, put on an exaggerated serious face. "You asked for it, sister!" His left arm split open and with a couple clicks something akin to a little paddle appeared on the end of his wrist. He shoved it into the full sink and sent it spinning, spewing a continuous slosh of water in her direction.

Anne was ready this time, and leapt out of the way as the wave came toward her. She laughed haughtily. “You fool! You’ve sacrificed maneuverability for fire power!” She circled him at a distance, grinning and bouncing her loaded turkey baster up and down in one hand.

There was a peel of laughter from behind her, and she turned to see Pie and Tom watching from the other wall. “Run, kids, save yourselves!” She shouted, only half joking. Sadie was going to kill them when she saw this mess.

"Ah...so naive." Rover gave an evil chuckle and while she turned to look at the kids, dipped the dish towel in the water, rolled it in a ball and chucked it at her.

Anne turned around just in time to get a face full of dish towel. She staggered back a step, then stood there with her eyes closed as the thing slid off and slapped onto the wet floor. She heaved a sigh, and nodded in acceptance of his victory. Then she took aim and squirted the hat right off his head with her rather powerful turkey baster.

“A snake may still strike, even after it is dead.” She said, and blew imaginary smoke from the nozzle of her weapon.

Rich appeared in the doorway, gripping the frame and looking like he’d just run a marathon. “Captain!”

Description
An unavoidable bit of fanart from a RP. Turkey baster vs mechanical arm. Which will win?

Captain Anne belongs to Artoveli

Behind them, the reel came to an end with a final, drawn-out note on the fiddle and a few loud thumps on the plastic tubs. Everybody cheered and clapped, and there was laughter all around. Anne and Rover also stopped with the music, and she wiped her brow with a sleeve.

“Whew! That is one high-energy dance!” She said.

Rover was trying valiantly to hide the fact that he too was quite out of breath. His cheeks and ears were red from the exertion but his grin never wavered. "It's a chipper one for sure. It was fine to have such a quick study as a dance pardner." He put a hand to the stitch in his side. "That cook of yours got some fiddlin' arm, don't she?"

“Why, thank you, sir.” Anne replied, with a bow of exaggerated formality. “That was a lot of fun. I... haven’t gotten to dance with a partner in a long time, either.” She realized as soon as she said it that it wasn’t exactly what Rover had said, and she tried to back-peddal. “Sorry, I don’t mean either, I mean... period.” Her cheeks became a little pinker.

Rover's brows raised at her first comment but he grew a smile that ended in an amused chuckle as he watched her struggle to fix it. He patted her on the shoulder. "Don't strain yourself, darlin. I know what you meant."

Anne furrowed her brow and smiled uncertainly. Being pat on the shoulder just made her blush more, and she couldn’t put her finger on exactly why. One thing was sure, though- she needed water! Stepping over to the table she’d been sitting at before, she picked up her cup and was disappointed to see that it only had a drop left. She saw that the pitcher was empty too. Picking it up, she turned and started heading for the kitchen.

“I’ll be back, with water.” She said as she passed Rover.

"I'll carry that for ya." Rover insisted, taking the pitcher from her and following her

“Uh- It- Ookay.” Anne said, surprised, as he pulled the pitcher from her hand.

Then she paused, registering the smell for the first time. She saw Sadie pushing her way purposefully through the crowd that had gathered at the counter. “Oh boy.”

Sadie entered the kitchen and placed her hands on her hips. “Well! ‘Ere’s an ‘owdy-do, luh!” She walked over to the oven and watched as Nana pulled out the latest tray. “Yer not half brazen!” Then she looked at the buns themselves, and her demeanor settled a little. She plucked a metal chopstick from a nearby tray and tapped the top of one of the buns experimentally, appraising the crust and the springback. Satisfied, she looked at Nana. “But I’ll admit, you knows what yer at.”

When they got to the kitchen- not stopping at the counter but going straight in, since they were after water- they found both of their cooks in congenial conference.

“Land sakes, me dear, ‘ow does you get dat texture jes right?” Sadie asked, poking at a fragment of bun that she held in her hand.

Nana pulled a little pouch from under her shirt, opened it and took a pinch of a lavender powder to show her. She wiggled her fingers and it became a little hovering cloud for a moment before slowly floating toward the ground. "Cloud flower. Good for bread. Just a little."

“Land sakes...” Sadie murmured, putting out her hand to catch the falling flour, and peering at it in fascination.

Anne stepped up to them, hesitantly. “Everything... alright?”

Sadie looked up at Anne. “Oh, Captain! You must be here- in my kitchen- for to git a start on them dishes, eh? Can’t tink why else yous’d be back here!” She grinned, one fist on her hip as she sat on a stool next to Nana.

Anne held up her hands. “We’re just here for water!”

“Ohh no ye don’t, dere’s a water spigot out on the counter and you knows it. Yous two came inside a my kitchen, an’ you knows the rules!”

“I just wanted to check and see if everything was okay.”

“Fine! We’s havin’ a fine time back here, luv, as ye kin plainly see! Now, you and yer gentleman friend best roll up your sleeves and get to work.”

“But... I’m the captain.” Anne said lamely.

“Yes, a course you are, me luv!” Sadie nodded. “Everywheres else on dis ship.”

“Oooh...” Anne started rolling up a sleeve. She was pretty sure Sadie wouldn’t have pulled this on the other captain. Something occurred to her. “Rover’s got a metal arm!”

“Sure I’s heard dem all now!” Sadie shook her head at Nana. “Does you ‘affta deal with dis kind of backtalk in your kitchen, too?”

Anne continued rolling up her sleeves, and turned to Rover. “You don’t have to wash any dishes. Get out, while you still can!”

Nana nodded sagely. "Always trouble. always. Go serve, yes?" She pulled one of the trays.

Rover rolled up both sleeves. "wash or dry?"

“I can’t believe this.” Anne said, blushing furiously as she handed Rover a wet casserole dish. “You come here as a guest and you wind up washing dishes. There’s something about Sadie!” She stopped scrubbing and gestured emphatically with both hands. “I can put my foot down with everyone else on this crew, but I can’t seem to stand up to Sadie Braff!” She grabbed the sponge and went back to work. “Land sakes.” She muttered.

Rover burst out laughing. "It's a cook thing, I reckon. Nobody tells Nana what to do. An’ boy, she will crack ya in the shins if ya don’t clean yer plate." He clutched the towel in his fist and rotated his hand at the wrist, spinning the towel and drying the thing in less than a second.

“Maybe that’s it, then!” Anne said, running more hot water. She started tossing cutlery into the rinse basin as she washed them, piece by piece. “So... You’ve seen a lot of Westerns? I’ve only seen a couple in my life: Back to the Future III, and Fievel Goes West. I’m... not sure how much either of those count, really... And actually, we don’t really watch Fievel anymore, on account of one of the villains being a spider... A bit insensitive, with Pie on the crew now.” She grabbed a fistful of rinsed cutlery and shook it out, before dumping it into the drying rack for Rover. “So my question is- Got any recommendations? Chances are good that we’d have most of them in our own movie archive.” She looked at him. “Movies are... kind of big where we come from. Every ship in the fleet is named after a classic. ‘Casablanca’ is the name of an old black-and-white movie... that I have yet to see...” She murmured this last part, a bit embarrassed. She knew she should probably see the movie her ship was named after. She meant to- it was on her to-do list! But a lot of things were on her to-do list.

"'fraid I'm only familiar with the mouse one." Rover said with a bit of a chuckle. "An’ it's on here..." He tapped the little pendant under his shirt. "So I reckon it counts. With the kiddos, probably might want to steer clear of John Wayne, gets a mite gritty. Anything with Gene Autry, Roy Rogers or Slim Danger ought to do ya good. I lean towards preferin' the likes of Slim, myself."

Anne’s face lit up. “No kidding- You have Fievel Goes West on that thing?? I mean, we can’t watch it now, but Rand and I must have seen that thing a million times as kids! I still get the songs stuck in my head sometimes!” She was grinning ear to ear as she went to work on the next casserole dish. “Slim Danger, huh? I don’t recognize the name off the top of my head, but I’ll search the guide and see what comes up!”

"It's a good'n. I'll have to show ya. 'Bout a sheriff of this little town, an' all the folk that live 'round. Townsfolk, visitors, Indians. Slim, why, he's the toughest, bravest and all round nicest fellah you ever saw. An' his gal Bessy...Purdy thing..." He cleared his throat. "Not as purdy as some starship captains, though, I reckon." He suddenly was very intent on drying the dish in his hands.

Anne did nooooot know what to say to that. So, in lieu of speech, and without giving it much thought, she dipped the slotted spoon she had just washed into the rinse basin, and splashed him.

Rover didn't look over but his brows shot straight up in surprise. Well, it wasn't a slap in the face. a little grin slid up one side of his face and as he was drying the next item he deliberately dipped the edge of his spinning towel in the water, splashing her back.

Anne saw it coming, but too late. “Abph!” She sputtered, and held up her arm to shield her face. “Oh yeeeah?” She said, a little evilly, as she brought a turkey baster up out of the dishwater. What a turkey baster had to do with casserole, Sadie alone knew. Anne submerged it in the rinse basin and filled it up. She squinted at Rover. “Alright, Pilgrim, draw.”

Rover squinted, put on an exaggerated serious face. "You asked for it, sister!" His left arm split open and with a couple clicks something akin to a little paddle appeared on the end of his wrist. He shoved it into the full sink and sent it spinning, spewing a continuous slosh of water in her direction.

Anne was ready this time, and leapt out of the way as the wave came toward her. She laughed haughtily. “You fool! You’ve sacrificed maneuverability for fire power!” She circled him at a distance, grinning and bouncing her loaded turkey baster up and down in one hand.

There was a peel of laughter from behind her, and she turned to see Pie and Tom watching from the other wall. “Run, kids, save yourselves!” She shouted, only half joking. Sadie was going to kill them when she saw this mess.

"Ah...so naive." Rover gave an evil chuckle and while she turned to look at the kids, dipped the dish towel in the water, rolled it in a ball and chucked it at her.

Anne turned around just in time to get a face full of dish towel. She staggered back a step, then stood there with her eyes closed as the thing slid off and slapped onto the wet floor. She heaved a sigh, and nodded in acceptance of his victory. Then she took aim and squirted the hat right off his head with her rather powerful turkey baster.

“A snake may still strike, even after it is dead.” She said, and blew imaginary smoke from the nozzle of her weapon.

Rich appeared in the doorway, gripping the frame and looking like he’d just run a marathon. “Captain!”