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CrashArtist — Coke melted my brain
Published: 2008-12-31 05:17:52 +0000 UTC; Views: 229; Favourites: 2; Downloads: 7
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Description
Today I'm made of coke and teen angstI'll be passionate and indecisive
and play all the teen games
I'll watch as I'm watched
and do whatever
to make you stare
I'll flirt and lead you on
pretend like I'm original
if that's in now anyways
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Tomorrow
I'll be made of new and shit I shouldn't hear
It'll taste like fresh and smell like pavement
The kind that gets [add action here] ten times a day
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By the end of the week
I'll be ready to be made of different
so I can get it over with
and start all over
Comments: 10
I love the opening stanza.. very creative and witty overall.. you should do more like this.
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Thank you, I definitely will
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I see Eric's been swooning over your writing. xD And not for no reason! The language is simple but creative, and the breaks are a unique addition. I haven't seen breaks used in poetry, but it works well. Your writing is original, even if the narrator (that I guess may or may not be yourself) disagrees.
That conversation amuses me. XD I can imagine having a similar reaction myself. I also giggled at the name you've given your friend. I'd hope you're not really talking to trees all day, or else I'd be worrying about what kind of coke you were referring to as well. XD
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Oh and yes, I am the narrator
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Thank you, I'm glad you enjoy it so much, and the "tree" thing is used is referring to my friends nickname, he was given it in JHS and it's stuck ever since, I'm not even certain that most of the kids in my High school know his real name XD, I'm also glad the breaks seem to be working, I think I'll put them to proper use
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That's what I figured, but it's still funny to me. XD It reminds me of a classmate at my school whom everyone calls Mouse. I don't even know what her real name is-- it's always been Mouse. XD
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This is also very good, you're very good...
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