Comments: 62
dragoeniex In reply to ??? [2014-06-10 22:16:55 +0000 UTC]
XD I completely agree.
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dragoeniex In reply to TheChesherCat [2014-05-30 17:43:42 +0000 UTC]
A new scarf, among other things. ^_^ Thank you.
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Deathwolf555 [2014-05-30 02:03:23 +0000 UTC]
I really enjoyed this. I thought i wasn't because most things like this(I don't really know what to call it, Fanfiction?) are poorly written and the characters aren't likeable. You have both made a character likeable and it is wonderfully written. Great Job!
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Deathwolf555 In reply to dragoeniex [2014-05-31 01:42:11 +0000 UTC]
It's still cool anyways~ I love Dragons and Phoenixes
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Phantomtigers [2014-05-30 02:03:10 +0000 UTC]
As someone with very very curly hair, this makes me feel better about taking an hour to comb them out every morning T_T
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KiraMcLean [2014-05-30 01:51:39 +0000 UTC]
I think it was lovely
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BloodLily16 [2014-05-29 21:52:37 +0000 UTC]
Dandruff indeed. XD
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SCFrankles [2014-05-29 20:59:09 +0000 UTC]
Congratulations on the DD ^^
Many months ago I waited too long and someone suggested something else for your first DD. But this is the one I was going to suggest - better late than never ^_^
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KCsummerz [2014-05-29 17:49:08 +0000 UTC]
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Sorrowscoldfrost [2014-05-29 16:22:46 +0000 UTC]
This was great! And Ari was really cute!
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dragoeniex In reply to Steve-C2 [2014-05-30 04:21:19 +0000 UTC]
Aw, thank you. It makes me smile to think that another kid might hear about tangle fairies. ^_^ Cheers to you too!
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glowworm56 [2014-05-29 12:31:21 +0000 UTC]
This is adorable--the line "He decided “dandruff” must have been a curse word." left me giggling.
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dragoeniex In reply to glowworm56 [2014-05-30 04:35:27 +0000 UTC]
Oh good. ^^ I was afraid that might get someone's dander up.
*dodges bricks*
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C-A-Harland [2013-09-23 05:20:43 +0000 UTC]
This is very sweet. I can just imagine all his toiling to weave her hair, only to have her brush it out in the morning.
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dragoeniex In reply to DailyBreadCafe [2013-09-23 22:01:13 +0000 UTC]
Please forgive the lateness of this reply. College has been keeping me away from writing and da, this past week.
Thank you very much for the feature! :3 I appreciate it, and I would love to return the favor once I get enough time to write up a journal entry. Fine by you?
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DailyBreadCafe [2013-09-13 13:21:29 +0000 UTC]
Hello! Here's my promised critique. (Sorry it's not very long, it was really hard for me to find any faults with it)
Overall, i really enjoyed this piece. When people write in the style of a fairytale, i get a bit worried because they're often all tell and no show, but i think you managed to balance it out. You absolutely chose the right style for this piece, and the protagonist's voice comes out quite strongly throughout. So really, well done.
A few things i found a little confusing were:
When the weaver is talking to Mr Greely, i didn't realise he was trying to push him out of the door until i read it again because i was a little confused about what had just happened. Maybe you could rewrite that a little bit. Also, could you give us a little bit more description of Mr Greely, because he says "Give the Mrs. and the griffonlings my regards.” and i'm sort of thinking, is Mr Greely a griffin or....? I mean, don't do a massive description dump, but i'd quite like to know.
"letting in the occasional drop of rain and fairy." - to me, this sounds like more fairies are being blown through the window, not just him.
"then nuzzled deeper into the pillow they shared" - when i first read this, i was like "who're they?" and then i realised you mean the weaver and the girl, but i think maybe you should say something else rather than shared because for me, if she was sharing the pillow she'd be aware of him. And also, we don't yet know that he's standing on a pillow, and that's why i was like "who's they?!"
Apart from that, i really enjoyed it. My favourite part was the little bit of comedy in there to do with the word "dandruff". Genius!
Keep up the great writing!
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DailyBreadCafe In reply to dragoeniex [2013-09-14 19:32:27 +0000 UTC]
You're very welcome, i'm glad i could be useful!
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SCFrankles [2013-08-28 20:45:23 +0000 UTC]
Congratulations on second place! Your story absolutely deserved a prize ^^
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