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escaped-emotions — Ignited Flames
Published: 2010-05-03 16:26:02 +0000 UTC; Views: 1820; Favourites: 15; Downloads: 61
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Description
My senses ignite,flames brought to life
as we gently embrace
and pull apart with swift ease.
Our hands entwine,
laced and knotted
tied shoe laces
our hands become.
My body softens,
honey from a bee's hive,
melting chocolate under sunny rays
as leaning into you,
I ooze from within.
Our bodies kiss,
blooming spring flowers
bursting from winter soil
as each touch deepens
we flourish and ignite.
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Comments: 18
The presentation is succinct and complete. A thorough thought is presented with imagery that conveys the desired emotive effect. We can easily see that this is the experience of a new encounter, and feel that encounter as it takes place.
In particular, this demonstrates the way a person "swoons" in the throes of new romance. Obviously, heat is required for anything to melt, and this was aptly presented.
The vision of new growth denotes this as a new experience, becoming an overall experience easily identified with by the reader.
It is concise enough not to fall into the trap of over-complicating a simple idea.
Overall, a good piece worth reading.
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Hey, thanks so much for the critique -- I really appreciate all of your feedback so thank you for taking the time to write the above. 
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No problem. It's how I got better...
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Aw, I'm so very pleased you enjoyed it - I'm so happy.
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This is absolutely beautiful. I enjoy the way your emotions are presented; it's heartfelt and 'innocent' yet passionate at the same time. Very enjoyable!
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It really impresses me the way you choose your words perfectly...
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LOL! What?! Are my poems bugging you?
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NO NO NOT AT ALL. SORRY IF THAT WAS THE IMPRESSION. I ASKED IN A GOOD WAY. IM REALLY SORRY
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OF COURSE I LIKE THEM. AND YOUR EYES ALSO
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