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Description
4 am.
My new favorite word is haunting me.
Uhtceare.
The time before dawn where you lay awake worrying about
everything.
I think about the fact that I'm passive aggressive
and really shouldn't be.
I don't like
that you don't like
the fact that I'm passive aggressive.

I try thinking about something else.
Like the way your whole body shakes when you laugh.
A tiny earthquake that makes everything
fine again.

Uhtceare.
My worried thoughts are bouncing up and down next to me.
Forcing me to pay attention to them.
I don't feel like giving them individual names.
I think about how I should feel better about
myself.
The uncertainty if I ever will.
The idea of
me.

4:05 am.
Uhtceare.
I sigh,
and I count the days until I see you.
14 days -
2 weeks.
My heart feels heavy,
alone.

I try thinking about something else.
Like the way your whole body shakes when you laugh.
A tiny earthquake that makes my
uhtceare
go away.

Description
4 am.
My new favorite word is haunting me.
Uhtceare.
The time before dawn where you lay awake worrying about
everything.
I think about the fact that I'm passive aggressive
and really shouldn't be.
I don't like
that you don't like
the fact that I'm passive aggressive.

I try thinking about something else.
Like the way your whole body shakes when you laugh.
A tiny earthquake that makes everything
fine again.

Uhtceare.
My worried thoughts are bouncing up and down next to me.
Forcing me to pay attention to them.
I don't feel like giving them individual names.
I think about how I should feel better about
myself.
The uncertainty if I ever will.
The idea of
me.

4:05 am.
Uhtceare.
I sigh,
and I count the days until I see you.
14 days -
2 weeks.
My heart feels heavy,
alone.

I try thinking about something else.
Like the way your whole body shakes when you laugh.
A tiny earthquake that makes my
uhtceare
go away.