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Description
i’m not an english student. my
prof tells us people don’t like duality,
he says it disgusts them,

that’s why zombies
and transgenders

scare them and my eyes wander.
maybe if i was another man, less desensitized,
it would have offended me more.

maybe i would have done something
more than write a poem. but this is how
it is, i know that. he doesn’t know
that i’ve spend years rebelling against a

creator i don’t even know exists. or prying
affection from a father who is afraid of me.

he doesn’t know
i sometimes look in the mirror
and see parts of me
that are not mine but someone else's.

so he seems to have tried
to garden shame from me but all i know
how to give is rage. so maybe

i am the creature. maybe i’m a metaphor
for christ, yelling why have you forsaken me
to an empty sky. because what is more queer

than having both father’s hate you. to crave
companionship like it’s the name you don’t have.
to sail away on into ice so you can’t hurt anyone else

just by being.

Description
i’m not an english student. my
prof tells us people don’t like duality,
he says it disgusts them,

that’s why zombies
and transgenders

scare them and my eyes wander.
maybe if i was another man, less desensitized,
it would have offended me more.

maybe i would have done something
more than write a poem. but this is how
it is, i know that. he doesn’t know
that i’ve spend years rebelling against a

creator i don’t even know exists. or prying
affection from a father who is afraid of me.

he doesn’t know
i sometimes look in the mirror
and see parts of me
that are not mine but someone else's.

so he seems to have tried
to garden shame from me but all i know
how to give is rage. so maybe

i am the creature. maybe i’m a metaphor
for christ, yelling why have you forsaken me
to an empty sky. because what is more queer

than having both father’s hate you. to crave
companionship like it’s the name you don’t have.
to sail away on into ice so you can’t hurt anyone else

just by being.