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lisuli79 β Sand!
#anakinskywalker #leiaorgana #leiaskywalker #lukeskywalker #padmeamidala #princessleia #skywalkerfamily #familyfluff #anidala #starwarsau #happyau
Published: 2017-01-16 20:37:11 +0000 UTC; Views: 75135; Favourites: 651; Downloads: 1
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Description
AU where the only nightmares Anakin has are about sand
(also, when you totally do not realize your little ones sneaked in your bed and you get smacked, I know the feeling 
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Comments: 95
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Awwwwww so glad you enjoyed this little thing π€
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Only Anakin would have nightmares about sand. Is there a phobia for sand because I think Anakin has it. It's completelyΒ understandable that he'd have nightmares; he watched his mother die in his arms and then fought in the Clone Wars. It's sad that Anakin would be lucky if the only thing he had was PTSD. I love how Luke is with Padme and Leia is with Anakin (I have a soft spot for mamma's boy Luke and daddy's girl Leia). Are you mommy? You sound like you're speaking from experience.
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I don't blame Anakin for having PTSD regarding sand. I also grew up in a desert, and I have PTSD flashes every time I experience heat above 100 degrees. Which given that I live in Arizona is every day during the summer.Β
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I didn't know that was possible. Did you haveΒ a really traumatic experience or something?
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Yes. It's actually quite normal, but due to my autism complicating the development of my neurophysiology, I'm capable of quite a few feats that many people struggle with, just as normal are capable of things that I am not. I reflexively repressed my memories, which is not easy to do, given that I possess an eidetic memory. To do this, my mind was gradually divided into three interlinked but divided layers. It is not true dissociative identity disorder, but the gaps in my consciousness were enough to block out certain memories and personality traits.Β
I am not comfortable sharing all of the details of my past on here, which I trust you will understand as you seem like an inordinately reasonable and empathetic human being.
However, my experiences included being put on life-threatening med trials; being bullied relentlessly at in my neighborhood and at my schools by peers and teachers alike; being brutally arrested on false pretenses and spending a day in jail at age 12; being threatened with isolation cells at school by my teachers that were the size of a small shower for hours at a time in handcuffs; my peers and teacher psychologically waging war on me with constant belittlement and criticism; being physically assaulted on a daily basis with methods that include water torture, electrocution, stabbing, beating, bludgeoning, burning with both fire and hot metal, pressure point torture, nearly having my eye cut out with a beer bottle because they thought I was faking my eye color with contacts (I'm of mixed heritage with my eyes being green and having blond hair but with Asian eyes and light yellow skin), having my head nearly forcibly shaved several times, almost being molested by a pair of counterfeit missionaries-in-training while my folks were out when I was eight (one of which I stabbed in the shin with a carving knife when he tried to come in), having my own sensory overload used to torture me with loud noises and bright lights and strong smells, and far worse. You could understand how this and the worse things I endured could warp the mind of a child.Β
Those three layers of my mind were divided into the parts needed to survive: The Strategist (the protective layer and most prominent contributor of my public behavior), the Creator (the core or central nexus of my mind, or original self prior to trauma), and the Berserker (the survivor, fighter, and my sense of self-respect and honor). These are the three most prominent layers of my consciousness. I purposely divided my mind into these three categories to protect myself from mental harm, much like how professional movers disassemble a complex device like a piano for transportation over rough terrain when moving the piece to a remote location and then reassemble on stable ground. That's what I did as a child. It's weird when you recover memories. You've dissociated from them for so long...that you feel like a copy of somebody else's memories... I got that last line from Epsilon from Red vs. Blue.Β
It was actually from watching that series that I understood what I did to myself as a kid to survive the pain. It helped me to understand that what happened was just a scared kid trying to get by. A child is the most precious thing on this planet, because they are the most human out of us all. Nothing is stronger than a child's will to live when things get rough. I just didn't want my will to live to cost me my humanity, even as a kid.Β
I hope this didn't overwhelm you. I am known to be guilty of putting too much on people at times.Β
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Wow, that sounds really horrible, I thought you'd just passed out from heat stroke or something. It's actually not uncommon for people with PTSD to have gaps in their memory from traumatic events.
I'm also Autistic and have a phobia of doctors and anything medical related, which I've struggled with since I was a child so I can kind of understand. I had seizures when I almost right after I was born and was in the hospital for several days, which is thought might be the cause of my phobia. Even though I don't have conscious memories because I was too young, the trauma still probably affected me. There's definitely something that feels like it takes over that doesn't feel like it's a part of me when I get like that, only caring about survival.
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Trust me, it was not fun by any means. However, I learned that laughing at my own pain helps me deal with it. The path I walk is paved with the bones of my demons and the masonry of every wall I've been pressed against. I simply take solace in knowing that I never give up.Β
It's amazing how many of our people I run into on this site. Then again, many of us learn to appreciate art as a means for communicating without words. I don't doubt for a moment that you have been affected by your life's early complications. Our people tend to remember too much of life, even at such a young age. However, there is a positive side from what I've learned from living my life with autism: with our less regulated senses, lack of constriction by societal norms, and the struggle to communicate, we are essentially more of who we are than the average person. We are a more intense type of human in regards to our experience, but it also makes us that much more human. How does that line up with your experience?Β
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I am, I am
mom to a four and a half years child 
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"The desert is merciless. It takes everything from you."
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Lawl omgosh that is too precious for words. X3 The 'sand' nightmare made me laugh. XDDD PffffΒ
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Ahahahahaha thank you! This was inspired from my real family life you know, if instead of "Sand" you put "Spiders everywhere!!!", there, you have my husband XD
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You're welcome!
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6 panels.Β How is this both heartbreaking, cute and funny when it's just 6 panels?
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XD eh sometimes it's just luck
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Love a happy ending for the Skywalker family!
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This is still the comic I made that I'm particularly proud of
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With reasons. Doubt there's someone who wouldn't like to see them like this. Β
It make all of us happy!
Great job!
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I know, that's one of the reasons I'm following you, the other is your great art style
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Oh gosh I'm truly feeling flattered now
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SAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAND!
Man, he was scared XD
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Awwww thank you so much
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Sand is best (Even though he doesn't). This is too adorable
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Eheheheeh I'm happy you liked his little stupid comic
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