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I'll be posting my story here as well!  If you're interested in it, please feel free to follow my other account: ManuWrites
Thank you if you take the time to read it!

Previous Chapter:
Next Chapter:

All Chapters HERE.

CHAPTER 43: PURPOSE

                Malia was more baffled at her own breakdown than Kadem was. The one thing she had always been proud of, the one part of herself she had consistently relied on, was her determination. Her eagerness to act and her longing for a goal, even when she had been hopelessly aimless, were rooted in who she was. So why am I standing still now? Why were her proverbial feet entombed in the unmovable soil?
                Kadem’s protective spell around the tiny rock was an insurmountable boundary, taller than the great stone wall and denser than her deepest fears. Malia’s head was pounding, most likely because of her protracted magical efforts, and the rhythmical pain made the world more confining with every brutal throb. How hard could it be to define her motivation? How obscure could her straightforward desires be?
                “I’m keeping my core motives in mind,” Malia heard her own words as feeble excuses, “but it won’t even budge. I don’t know what to do differently. It’s like I’m… crawling underwater… in the dark.”
                “Plum, calm down.” Kadem kneeled next to her, placing a firm hand on her shoulder. The gesture would have normally relieved the princess, but then and there it stung like unwanted pity. “Are you sure you found your core? As long as that is clear everything else will come naturally; it will require effort, yes, but the path will be there, the same as training your physical body. Are you positive that what you’re keeping in mind are your true motives?”
                “I am!” Malia’s voice came out louder than she intended, “I’ve always known! Ever since I was little I knew I wanted to make the world a better place!”
                “What I think won’t change a thing, so stop screaming at me.” Kadem pointed at Malia, “The one you need to convince is yourself. If you’re sure that’s your core, and it isn’t working, then you’re lying to yourself. Simple as that. Keep looking.”
                “But I’m not lying!”
                Kadem rubbed her temples. Malia was obviously exhausted, which made sense given normal magicians couldn’t just cast magic continually for a whole day. That was a mistake on my part. A mind obfuscated by fatigue would never unveil its own riddles, even less so considering the frustration and shame the princess was exuding. It’s time to call it a day, Kadem concluded.
                “So you’re not lying?” Gabrielle’s hoarse voice surprised both the silver witch and her student.
                Kadem’s unshakable awareness had allowed her to sense Gabrielle approaching, so it wasn’t her presence that shocked her; it was the dark woman’s decision to get involved that was confusing.
                Gabrielle’s sudden appearance made Malia acutely conscious of how disgraceful her predicament and demeanor were. She had so many questions for her master, worries and feelings she wished to share, but at that moment she couldn’t even handle her amber stare. “…I’m not.” The princess answered weakly, not knowing how to breach the distance her embarrassment had built. Ideally she would have wanted to greet her master, to ask about her health and offer her help… but instead she held her tongue. She couldn’t run from her current failure.
                “Very well then.” Gabrielle continued, “Tell me what your core desire is. I’ll be the judge.”
                “I… I want to make the world around me fair.”
                “Oh!” Gabrielle’s performed amazement was an overt mockery, “You’re quite the selfless hero then, aren’t you?”
                Malia lowered her head, so hurt by the derision she startled herself. Having her dreams of being a hero of justice treated as a shallow façade damaged her spirits. Why can’t I retort? She had no time to search for an answer though: an abrupt blow shook her entire body, sending her face-first to the ground as the sensation of immaterial needles blasting her nose delayed any thinking. When she realized that her master had kicked her, her emotions became even more tumultuous; despite the intense pain, she had been hit enough times by her master to know the attack had been sluggish, and Gabrielle wasn’t one to hold back.
                “Stop groveling if you don’t want to be kicked in the face.” Gabrielle reprimanded her, “I asked you a question. Stand up and reply. Are you a selfless hero?”
                “Abusing your pupil doesn’t strike me as the most efficient teaching method.” Kadem intervened, “And you’re in no condition to be-”
                “How I choose to educate my disciple is none of your business.” Gabrielle cut her off fiercely, “I only interfered because you were failing miserably at training her.” She then got a hold of Kadem’s arm and gripped it in a begging manner, a soft murmur escaping her lips, “Please let me handle this.”
                Kadem couldn’t find it in her to reject the woman’s plea, even though she doubted any good would come of it. She stepped back silently, ready to stop any development that might threaten Malia’s, or Gabrielle’s, wellbeing.
                Gabrielle returned her attention to Malia, who by then was sitting up and wiping her bloody nose with the back of her hand, “I’m jealous you know? Fighting to save the world sounds so righteous, so noble!” The dark woman kept up her derision, “I do wonder though… Isn’t fighting for everyone just as lonely as fighting for no one in particular? I seem to recall that when we met, the little girl that clung to me had no lofty ideals, nor the resolve to shoulder loneliness; quite the contrary, actually. Was my impression mistaken?”
                “…No.” Malia remembered. Her master had been her savior back then, the one who had led the way when there had been none.
                “Why did you want to be strong?” Gabrielle pressed, “Did the little girl pester me to train her for the sake of ‘everyone’?”
                “No.” Malia didn’t want to recall, but she did anyway, “Back then I found out that knowing the truth is useless if you’re weak. I thought Gorken had been killed because of me. I felt guilty, and angry, and worthless.”
                “Is guilt your core?” Gabrielle crouched near her, “Or revenge, maybe?”
                “No.” Malia was certain.
                “Why did you want strength then?”
                Why did I choose strength? Everything had been simpler back then, even her grief. Maybe I just wanted to make it up to Gorken. To be strong like him, to feel worthy of being alive when he no longer was. Is that it? “Because of Gorken.” Malia mumbled flimsily, but that had to be it. The more she thought about it, the more sense it made. Gorken had been her beginning, her drive and her anchor. She had always loved him, even before knowing what love was.
                She rode her surge of newfound courage, grasping the white stone with all the power she could muster and infusing it with what she was sure was her true core. Of course it’s Gorken. It always has been. Malia then opened her palm to see the results of her epiphany. The white rock was pristine, as unbroken and unscathed as before.
                “It looks like you’re not a selfless hero of love either.” Gabrielle chuckled, “You’ve got to stop lying, eventually.”
                “I’m not lying!” Malia cried, “There must be something wrong with this rock! My love for Gorken isn’t a lie! My wish to make the world better isn’t a lie!”
                Gabrielle threw another kick, but this time Malia blocked it with her arms.
                “That’s better.” Gabrielle smirked as she withdrew her leg, “But you’re still groveling. That’s the problem when you try to be a selfless hero; you work as hard as you can, take risks no one else would take, but in the end you can’t answer the most basic question of all. And I thought you might be the real thing too!”
                “Why do you keep going on and on about a ‘selfless hero’?” Malia snapped. Gabrielle repeating it over and over again debased what to her was an ideal to aspire to. She was irreparably annoyed, enough to yell at her master.
                “Did I strike a chord?” Gabrielle laughed, “The mere concept of a selfless hero revolts me. There’s no such thing.”
                “Then why keep bringing it up?”
                A sly smile claimed Gabrielle’s features, “I didn’t bring it up. You’re the one who’s been talking about doing everything for the sake of others. First ‘the world’, then ‘Gorken’...”
                “Ah.” Malia brought a pensive hand to her chin. She’s right. How could I have missed something so obvious? The reason I want to be the hero I dreamed I could be as a child, strong like Gorken and powerful like my master… The reason I want the world around me to be fair in my eyes, the reason I want to be praiseworthy and brave… is because I want to feel good about myself. I want to be happy. It was so evident it was laughable. Everything I do, I do for myself.
                Malia’s arms were shaky, drained from her previous attempts, but she had to give it one last try. She squeezed the white stone, knowing both her magical energy and her muscles were depleted, knowing she wouldn’t summon enough power to match her earlier efforts… and the tiny rock crumbled inside her fist.
                “…This sure is vexing.” Malia said at last, “Why are you always right, master?”
                “Because I’m great.” Gabrielle crossed her arms, “And because I’m great, I’ll share some wisdom with you, my half-witted student. A hero is not someone who puts other people’s happiness before their own. A true hero is someone who finds their own happiness in helping others. There’s an abyss of difference in that subtle turn of phrase. Remember it.” With that, the teacher turned her back and walked away into Kadem’s tree.
                Malia was about to follow her master when Kadem impeded her, throwing a few white rocks to land in front of the princess, “Do what you just did to all of these, before the sensation of tapping into your core leaves you. You’re still in the middle of training. I’ll be back in a moment.” The silver witch rushed back to her home, leaving Malia in perplexed obedience.
                Gabrielle was grateful Aldous and Bayard weren’t inside the house yet, so the only one to witness her pathetic collapse over the table was Kadem.
                “Why did you do that?” the silver woman asked.
                “That fool has always responded faster to hits than to words.” Gabrielle sneered, “I thought I would give you a hand.”
                “That’s not what I asked. Why did you exert yourself when you know you’re-”
                “Spare me your pity, witch.” Gabrielle grunted, “Don’t talk softly to me just because I’m dying. You already know the answer to the question anyway. Or is that unnerving skill of yours not enough to read what I’m thinking?”
                “I’m asking because I want to hear it from you.” Kadem was unable to sound unkind.
                Gabrielle sighed in defeat, “I wanted to be of use. There’s nothing profound about it. I was fed up with my own futility. Did you know? When we rescued Malia from the dungeon, Gorken was torturing Cain… and I stopped him. I should have been ecstatic to see the son of that man reduced to a screaming pulp of meat, and instead I stopped it. I couldn’t stand the sight. What has been the point of it all, then? My quest for revenge fizzled out at a humiliating speed. So much for making King Amos pay, for making him suffer. I didn’t even have the resolve to let his beloved heir be tormented in front of me. What a farce I turned out to be.” She gazed at Kadem, “Happy?”
                “No.” the last silver child said, “Not until you talk to Plum. To them. Tell them about yourself.”
                “I might as well, for all the good staying in my room will do me.” Gabrielle struggled to keep the fear out of her voice, but Kadem perceived it anyway, “I’ll wait until Gorken and the demon twins come back. That boy’s sword might be my one hope. I’ll put my faith in the Guardian Clan not being hypocritical enough to wield a magical sword for generations… as thin as that faith may be. I’ll wait. I’ll wait.” She repeated, determined to stay alive until they all returned.

Description
I'll be posting my story here as well!  If you're interested in it, please feel free to follow my other account: ManuWrites
Thank you if you take the time to read it!

Previous Chapter:
Next Chapter:

All Chapters HERE.

CHAPTER 43: PURPOSE

                Malia was more baffled at her own breakdown than Kadem was. The one thing she had always been proud of, the one part of herself she had consistently relied on, was her determination. Her eagerness to act and her longing for a goal, even when she had been hopelessly aimless, were rooted in who she was. So why am I standing still now? Why were her proverbial feet entombed in the unmovable soil?
                Kadem’s protective spell around the tiny rock was an insurmountable boundary, taller than the great stone wall and denser than her deepest fears. Malia’s head was pounding, most likely because of her protracted magical efforts, and the rhythmical pain made the world more confining with every brutal throb. How hard could it be to define her motivation? How obscure could her straightforward desires be?
                “I’m keeping my core motives in mind,” Malia heard her own words as feeble excuses, “but it won’t even budge. I don’t know what to do differently. It’s like I’m… crawling underwater… in the dark.”
                “Plum, calm down.” Kadem kneeled next to her, placing a firm hand on her shoulder. The gesture would have normally relieved the princess, but then and there it stung like unwanted pity. “Are you sure you found your core? As long as that is clear everything else will come naturally; it will require effort, yes, but the path will be there, the same as training your physical body. Are you positive that what you’re keeping in mind are your true motives?”
                “I am!” Malia’s voice came out louder than she intended, “I’ve always known! Ever since I was little I knew I wanted to make the world a better place!”
                “What I think won’t change a thing, so stop screaming at me.” Kadem pointed at Malia, “The one you need to convince is yourself. If you’re sure that’s your core, and it isn’t working, then you’re lying to yourself. Simple as that. Keep looking.”
                “But I’m not lying!”
                Kadem rubbed her temples. Malia was obviously exhausted, which made sense given normal magicians couldn’t just cast magic continually for a whole day. That was a mistake on my part. A mind obfuscated by fatigue would never unveil its own riddles, even less so considering the frustration and shame the princess was exuding. It’s time to call it a day, Kadem concluded.
                “So you’re not lying?” Gabrielle’s hoarse voice surprised both the silver witch and her student.
                Kadem’s unshakable awareness had allowed her to sense Gabrielle approaching, so it wasn’t her presence that shocked her; it was the dark woman’s decision to get involved that was confusing.
                Gabrielle’s sudden appearance made Malia acutely conscious of how disgraceful her predicament and demeanor were. She had so many questions for her master, worries and feelings she wished to share, but at that moment she couldn’t even handle her amber stare. “…I’m not.” The princess answered weakly, not knowing how to breach the distance her embarrassment had built. Ideally she would have wanted to greet her master, to ask about her health and offer her help… but instead she held her tongue. She couldn’t run from her current failure.
                “Very well then.” Gabrielle continued, “Tell me what your core desire is. I’ll be the judge.”
                “I… I want to make the world around me fair.”
                “Oh!” Gabrielle’s performed amazement was an overt mockery, “You’re quite the selfless hero then, aren’t you?”
                Malia lowered her head, so hurt by the derision she startled herself. Having her dreams of being a hero of justice treated as a shallow façade damaged her spirits. Why can’t I retort? She had no time to search for an answer though: an abrupt blow shook her entire body, sending her face-first to the ground as the sensation of immaterial needles blasting her nose delayed any thinking. When she realized that her master had kicked her, her emotions became even more tumultuous; despite the intense pain, she had been hit enough times by her master to know the attack had been sluggish, and Gabrielle wasn’t one to hold back.
                “Stop groveling if you don’t want to be kicked in the face.” Gabrielle reprimanded her, “I asked you a question. Stand up and reply. Are you a selfless hero?”
                “Abusing your pupil doesn’t strike me as the most efficient teaching method.” Kadem intervened, “And you’re in no condition to be-”
                “How I choose to educate my disciple is none of your business.” Gabrielle cut her off fiercely, “I only interfered because you were failing miserably at training her.” She then got a hold of Kadem’s arm and gripped it in a begging manner, a soft murmur escaping her lips, “Please let me handle this.”
                Kadem couldn’t find it in her to reject the woman’s plea, even though she doubted any good would come of it. She stepped back silently, ready to stop any development that might threaten Malia’s, or Gabrielle’s, wellbeing.
                Gabrielle returned her attention to Malia, who by then was sitting up and wiping her bloody nose with the back of her hand, “I’m jealous you know? Fighting to save the world sounds so righteous, so noble!” The dark woman kept up her derision, “I do wonder though… Isn’t fighting for everyone just as lonely as fighting for no one in particular? I seem to recall that when we met, the little girl that clung to me had no lofty ideals, nor the resolve to shoulder loneliness; quite the contrary, actually. Was my impression mistaken?”
                “…No.” Malia remembered. Her master had been her savior back then, the one who had led the way when there had been none.
                “Why did you want to be strong?” Gabrielle pressed, “Did the little girl pester me to train her for the sake of ‘everyone’?”
                “No.” Malia didn’t want to recall, but she did anyway, “Back then I found out that knowing the truth is useless if you’re weak. I thought Gorken had been killed because of me. I felt guilty, and angry, and worthless.”
                “Is guilt your core?” Gabrielle crouched near her, “Or revenge, maybe?”
                “No.” Malia was certain.
                “Why did you want strength then?”
                Why did I choose strength? Everything had been simpler back then, even her grief. Maybe I just wanted to make it up to Gorken. To be strong like him, to feel worthy of being alive when he no longer was. Is that it? “Because of Gorken.” Malia mumbled flimsily, but that had to be it. The more she thought about it, the more sense it made. Gorken had been her beginning, her drive and her anchor. She had always loved him, even before knowing what love was.
                She rode her surge of newfound courage, grasping the white stone with all the power she could muster and infusing it with what she was sure was her true core. Of course it’s Gorken. It always has been. Malia then opened her palm to see the results of her epiphany. The white rock was pristine, as unbroken and unscathed as before.
                “It looks like you’re not a selfless hero of love either.” Gabrielle chuckled, “You’ve got to stop lying, eventually.”
                “I’m not lying!” Malia cried, “There must be something wrong with this rock! My love for Gorken isn’t a lie! My wish to make the world better isn’t a lie!”
                Gabrielle threw another kick, but this time Malia blocked it with her arms.
                “That’s better.” Gabrielle smirked as she withdrew her leg, “But you’re still groveling. That’s the problem when you try to be a selfless hero; you work as hard as you can, take risks no one else would take, but in the end you can’t answer the most basic question of all. And I thought you might be the real thing too!”
                “Why do you keep going on and on about a ‘selfless hero’?” Malia snapped. Gabrielle repeating it over and over again debased what to her was an ideal to aspire to. She was irreparably annoyed, enough to yell at her master.
                “Did I strike a chord?” Gabrielle laughed, “The mere concept of a selfless hero revolts me. There’s no such thing.”
                “Then why keep bringing it up?”
                A sly smile claimed Gabrielle’s features, “I didn’t bring it up. You’re the one who’s been talking about doing everything for the sake of others. First ‘the world’, then ‘Gorken’...”
                “Ah.” Malia brought a pensive hand to her chin. She’s right. How could I have missed something so obvious? The reason I want to be the hero I dreamed I could be as a child, strong like Gorken and powerful like my master… The reason I want the world around me to be fair in my eyes, the reason I want to be praiseworthy and brave… is because I want to feel good about myself. I want to be happy. It was so evident it was laughable. Everything I do, I do for myself.
                Malia’s arms were shaky, drained from her previous attempts, but she had to give it one last try. She squeezed the white stone, knowing both her magical energy and her muscles were depleted, knowing she wouldn’t summon enough power to match her earlier efforts… and the tiny rock crumbled inside her fist.
                “…This sure is vexing.” Malia said at last, “Why are you always right, master?”
                “Because I’m great.” Gabrielle crossed her arms, “And because I’m great, I’ll share some wisdom with you, my half-witted student. A hero is not someone who puts other people’s happiness before their own. A true hero is someone who finds their own happiness in helping others. There’s an abyss of difference in that subtle turn of phrase. Remember it.” With that, the teacher turned her back and walked away into Kadem’s tree.
                Malia was about to follow her master when Kadem impeded her, throwing a few white rocks to land in front of the princess, “Do what you just did to all of these, before the sensation of tapping into your core leaves you. You’re still in the middle of training. I’ll be back in a moment.” The silver witch rushed back to her home, leaving Malia in perplexed obedience.
                Gabrielle was grateful Aldous and Bayard weren’t inside the house yet, so the only one to witness her pathetic collapse over the table was Kadem.
                “Why did you do that?” the silver woman asked.
                “That fool has always responded faster to hits than to words.” Gabrielle sneered, “I thought I would give you a hand.”
                “That’s not what I asked. Why did you exert yourself when you know you’re-”
                “Spare me your pity, witch.” Gabrielle grunted, “Don’t talk softly to me just because I’m dying. You already know the answer to the question anyway. Or is that unnerving skill of yours not enough to read what I’m thinking?”
                “I’m asking because I want to hear it from you.” Kadem was unable to sound unkind.
                Gabrielle sighed in defeat, “I wanted to be of use. There’s nothing profound about it. I was fed up with my own futility. Did you know? When we rescued Malia from the dungeon, Gorken was torturing Cain… and I stopped him. I should have been ecstatic to see the son of that man reduced to a screaming pulp of meat, and instead I stopped it. I couldn’t stand the sight. What has been the point of it all, then? My quest for revenge fizzled out at a humiliating speed. So much for making King Amos pay, for making him suffer. I didn’t even have the resolve to let his beloved heir be tormented in front of me. What a farce I turned out to be.” She gazed at Kadem, “Happy?”
                “No.” the last silver child said, “Not until you talk to Plum. To them. Tell them about yourself.”
                “I might as well, for all the good staying in my room will do me.” Gabrielle struggled to keep the fear out of her voice, but Kadem perceived it anyway, “I’ll wait until Gorken and the demon twins come back. That boy’s sword might be my one hope. I’ll put my faith in the Guardian Clan not being hypocritical enough to wield a magical sword for generations… as thin as that faith may be. I’ll wait. I’ll wait.” She repeated, determined to stay alive until they all returned.