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Mystofeles — Omega

Published: 2007-07-25 06:40:43 +0000 UTC; Views: 1512; Favourites: 32; Downloads: 15
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Description Lana has some spiffy lookin' lace-up ninja tube sox.... (or so I call them)

My 'return threat' pic!

I received this note here one day from (yes, the following is really the entire note. lol )
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Setting: And old abandoned monastery of sorts. Ruined buildings, overgrown vegetation.

Two highly trained ninja face off. The Undone Man and Mystofeles, friendly rivals stand poised to trade blows.

Un: So we meet again.

Myst: What? I’ve never met you before.

Un: Yeah you have.

Myst: Oh yeah! Ninja University right? It’s been ages!

Un: No! I never went to N U.

Myst: Sorry about that. That was the Redone Man.

Un: *sigh*

Myst: So… uh… who are you again?

Un: I’m The Undone Man! You freaking kidnapped me and locked me in you garage!

Myst: Holy shit! That was you?!

Un: You don’t even remember your victims?!

Myst: I remember now. And then you got away and locked me in your tiny closet! By the way. How the hell did you escape?

Un: Secret ninja art of “The Garage Door Opener”.

Myst: Dammit! I knew I should have disarmed that stupid thing.

Un: Yeah, and by the way, Brad Pitt need fresh water and his litter changed. He’s really starting to stink. How did you escape from the closet?

Myst: I hid in the laundry basket and then escaped during the rinse cycle.

Un: I knew the washer was acting unusual!

Myst: Yeah I stabbed it a few times. And I also know a way to get those stubborn blood stains out of clothes if you’re interested.

Un: You stabbed my washing machine?

Myst: Hey! I’m a ninja! It’s what I do!

Un: True true.

Myst: Quick question before we throw down.

Un: Yes?

Myst: Why did you kidnap me?

Un: Well, I live alone with 4 rabbits. I get lonely. I wanted someone to talk to.

Myst: Yeah that whole living-alone-with-4-rabbits-while-locking-people-in-your-closet-to-talk-to-thing is really creepy. You need a hobby.

Un: Well… uh… why did you kidnap me?!

Myst: I collect cute things. And I thought you were kinda cute.

Un: So that’s why one of my bunnies is missing. Wait a minute! I wear a freaking hood and am shrouded in darkness! You’ve never seen my face!

Myst: Not that you know of.

Un: And you call me “creepy”?! When? Where?

Myst: Eh… you were shaving and I was hiding in the shower.

Un: Great… I’m going to have issues using that bathroom now.

Myst: You asked.

Un: Why didn’t I sense you there?

Myst: You’d been drinking heavily the night before. I figure you had one hell of a hangover.

Un: Holy shit! So you had been stalking me before that morning?!

Myst: Not so much “stalking”. More like casually observing.

Un: You’re sick!

Myst: This from the guy who talks to his 4… sorry.. 3 bunnies like their his kids, locks people in his closet, and has a psychotically extensive anime collection?!

Un: Hey! Say what you want but leave my bunnies and anime out of it.

Myst: Whatever! So we gonna throw down? You know.. epic ninja battle. Destruction and devastation in our wake.

Un: That’s what we’re here for.

Long long long pause and silence.

Un: Damn.. I’m hungry! I could go for some pizza or tacos.

Myst: Aw hell no! We’re here to wreck shop!

Un: Listen… we can fight till one or both of us dies if you want. Or we can go get some grub and continue our mutual friendship of kidnapping each other and escaping.

Myst: This doesn’t sound right.

Un: Pizza?

Myst: I like pizza! But I’m picking the toppings.

Un: Fine. No live octopus though.

Myst: How’d you know that I like live octopus on my pizza?!

Un: I have my ways.

Myst: You’ve been stalking me!!!

Un: No so much “stalking”. More like casually gawking and ogling. By the way, I really like the lacey underwear. Very cute.

Myst: I’ll KILL you!

Un: After the pizza.

Myst: Fine! But you’re paying, asshole!

Un: Aw, don’t get your lacey panties in a bunch.

Myst: Don’t make me bring up your back hair issue!

Un: What?! That’s just… uh… ritual markings!

Myst: Dude! That’s back hair! You might want to consider waxing or electrolysis.

Un: Silence!

Myst: Make me!

Un: Fine! Live octopus on half the pizza my treat!

Myst: Excellent.

Un: Ok so I’m thinking that we should trade off on kidnap days.

Myst: Sounds good.

Un: Oh.. and you should really give Johnny Depp some fresh greens and a bath. He really wasn’t looking to well when I was there.

Myst: Fine! But you need to put your dirty underwear in a separate clothes bin.

Un: Alright mom!

Myst: And stop washing your lights with your darks. It’s ruining your clothes!

Un: I have lights?

Myst: Men!

Un: Fine fine! But keep Russell Crowe away from me. All he wants to do is fight. And I really don’t want to have to kill him. I like his movies.

Myst: But he’s so cute when he’s angry.

Un: *sigh*

And thus the two wander off in search of a pizza parlor who will serve live octopus. Heaven help those who don’t.
Related content
Comments: 113

Mystofeles In reply to ??? [2007-07-27 16:50:56 +0000 UTC]

I like simplistic. lol Thanks!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

AnjiruOokami [2007-07-27 03:00:06 +0000 UTC]

LOL! Very nice socks...I LOVE that hair!

And "you stabbed my washing machine?" and the whole "lacey underwear" things killed me!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Mystofeles In reply to AnjiruOokami [2007-07-27 04:38:02 +0000 UTC]

I love the washing machine part. lol And the hair. ^^ Thanks!!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

AnjiruOokami In reply to Mystofeles [2007-07-27 21:33:30 +0000 UTC]

Your welcome!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

ChildofNowhere [2007-07-26 01:58:13 +0000 UTC]

oh.....wow....Honey, you need to get out more. . .actually, the dude who sent you this does...but still, great art. And it was a funny, if mostly psychotic and demented, note.

👍: 0 ⏩: 2

The-Undone-Man In reply to ChildofNowhere [2007-07-30 00:00:56 +0000 UTC]

You might be right. That guy seems to be a little nutty. Wait... That's me! Aw crap!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

ChildofNowhere In reply to The-Undone-Man [2007-07-30 03:49:12 +0000 UTC]

LOL well, we're all crazy here, so it's no big thing...it's the normal ones I worry about!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

The-Undone-Man In reply to ChildofNowhere [2007-07-30 04:25:36 +0000 UTC]

Ha.. too true.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

ChildofNowhere In reply to The-Undone-Man [2007-08-03 00:44:57 +0000 UTC]

and yet, the normal ones are the ones everyone loves. life's great...

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Mystofeles In reply to ChildofNowhere [2007-07-26 02:04:24 +0000 UTC]

The note gave me a good laugh. lol And hey, I'm pretty sure he gets out more than I do. lol

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

ChildofNowhere In reply to Mystofeles [2007-07-26 02:19:05 +0000 UTC]

lol Well, I'm betting you both get out more than I do, but that's by choice. I'd be a hermit if people would let me.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Mystofeles In reply to ChildofNowhere [2007-07-26 02:30:21 +0000 UTC]

Same here actually. lol It's hard to get me away from working on either my writing or my drawing.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

ChildofNowhere In reply to Mystofeles [2007-07-26 02:51:12 +0000 UTC]

well, for me, it's just that I don't particularly like people, and I don't particularly like getting out of my house, soooo.....

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Mystofeles In reply to ChildofNowhere [2007-07-26 02:53:01 +0000 UTC]

Nothin' wrong with that at all though.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

ChildofNowhere In reply to Mystofeles [2007-07-26 02:57:11 +0000 UTC]

there is if you're being shoved into getting a job, or you have a nosy friend who doesn't leave you alone unless you go places with her. Lucky me, I get both.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Mystofeles In reply to ChildofNowhere [2007-07-26 03:07:48 +0000 UTC]

Job isn't so bad. Pays all my bills anyways. But irritating with your friend, maybe it's just their way of checking you're still alive? lol

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

ChildofNowhere In reply to Mystofeles [2007-07-28 00:04:07 +0000 UTC]

lol yeah, well, coincidentally, my parents gave me a fluff job while I look for a different one. $75 a week to clean the house and keep it that way. $100 a month goes to a credit card, $50 to my savings, and I have to buy everything I need out of the rest, but still...pretty awesome. Now I'm not so sure I want a different job! As to the friend...yeah, it could be concern for my live status, but more than likely it's cuz I'm basically her only friend that will tolerate it...

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Mystofeles In reply to ChildofNowhere [2007-07-28 05:11:18 +0000 UTC]

Well what is obvious about all this then is that...you're tolerant. But cool that you have a job, even a fluff job. Money is nice, if not totally evil in nature. lol

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

ChildofNowhere In reply to Mystofeles [2007-07-30 03:55:20 +0000 UTC]

lol sometimes even if it is totally evil in nature, it's still fun. evil can be fun, right?

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Mystofeles In reply to ChildofNowhere [2007-07-30 15:01:44 +0000 UTC]

Yes.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

ChildofNowhere In reply to Mystofeles [2007-08-01 07:05:09 +0000 UTC]

Of course, the after effects usually aren't, but still.......

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Mystofeles In reply to ChildofNowhere [2007-08-01 14:24:17 +0000 UTC]

LOL

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

JadeThePredator [2007-07-26 00:23:05 +0000 UTC]

Omg, that was hilarious.

I love her outfit and her hair, not to mention her eyes! The odd-colored eyes thing always gets me. Great folds in the clothes and shading. The blade looks really nice, too.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Mystofeles In reply to JadeThePredator [2007-07-26 02:15:19 +0000 UTC]

lol! My fav part is how her hair turned out. And I still laugh at "you stabbed my washing machine?" every time.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Iron-Fox [2007-07-25 21:44:27 +0000 UTC]

very nicely done, a bit of suggestion for you.. add some creases on the glove, ( in the area, of the palm where the thumb connected to) I hope that made sense.
because right now it looks like the handle is going through the hand.
Other then that it's Dynamite.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Mystofeles In reply to Iron-Fox [2007-07-25 22:20:44 +0000 UTC]

Dude, now that I look at it, and tried out the hand position, that's way uncomfortable. Thanks for pointing that out. I'll pay more attention.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Iron-Fox In reply to Mystofeles [2007-07-25 22:37:58 +0000 UTC]

glad I could be of help

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

moongoddess71 [2007-07-25 21:24:25 +0000 UTC]

oooo..I like her. Awesome art!!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Mystofeles In reply to moongoddess71 [2007-07-25 22:18:45 +0000 UTC]

Thanks!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Empty-Attic [2007-07-25 19:04:53 +0000 UTC]

WTF!! the pic is awesome, and the little story made me laugh so much I nearly coughed up my liver!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Mystofeles In reply to Empty-Attic [2007-07-25 20:41:11 +0000 UTC]

I know, there's still a couple lines I can't read without cracking up. But glad you didn't lose your liver! You might need that.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Sachriel [2007-07-25 15:11:54 +0000 UTC]

"You don’t even remember your victims?!"

makes me wonder how many vicitms you've had

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Mystofeles In reply to Sachriel [2007-07-25 15:29:06 +0000 UTC]

Not even I remember who all has gone to my garage anymore. I just know Mark Dacascos (formerly the Crow on Stairway to Heaven, now Iron Chef chairman) keeps order out there. Someone has to. >> (Yes, I am far crazier than you previously believed. lol! )

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Sachriel In reply to Mystofeles [2007-07-26 08:40:08 +0000 UTC]

I have a friend that met that guy, but you have to keep a list of victims. otherwise the old saying kick ass and take names kinda doesn't work anymore

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Mystofeles In reply to Sachriel [2007-07-26 22:23:59 +0000 UTC]

lol! I'm going to have to remember that. And I'm incredibly jealous of your friend. o.O

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Sachriel In reply to Mystofeles [2007-07-26 23:31:37 +0000 UTC]

I only heard about it do't know if its true or not, she said she was drinking with him in vancouver

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Mystofeles In reply to Sachriel [2007-07-27 00:03:02 +0000 UTC]

Well then....it would depend on the number of drinks, now wouldn't it? (I couldn't even type that with a straight face. lol )

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Sachriel In reply to Mystofeles [2007-07-27 09:08:31 +0000 UTC]

yeah but then again shes never lied to me so I can trust she has

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Mystofeles In reply to Sachriel [2007-07-27 16:55:04 +0000 UTC]

Well even more awesome then. Therefore, I am still jealous. ><

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Sachriel In reply to Mystofeles [2007-07-28 23:58:08 +0000 UTC]

yeah same here cuz he was cool in brotherhood of the wolf to

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Mystofeles In reply to Sachriel [2007-07-29 22:18:11 +0000 UTC]

Yeah he was.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Sachriel In reply to Mystofeles [2007-07-30 02:20:23 +0000 UTC]

I gotta watch that movie again, I wanna get a good pic of the beast

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Mystofeles In reply to Sachriel [2007-07-30 14:55:55 +0000 UTC]

Just for kicks?

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Sachriel In reply to Mystofeles [2007-07-30 14:57:46 +0000 UTC]

hell no, I want one for a pet!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Mystofeles In reply to Sachriel [2007-07-30 15:11:39 +0000 UTC]

lol!! I think you might need a permit for that.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Sachriel In reply to Mystofeles [2007-07-31 14:59:54 +0000 UTC]

probably.. here you need permits to just own a pitbull and laws state it must be muzzled, leashed and you cannot breed them

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Mystofeles In reply to Sachriel [2007-08-01 00:43:29 +0000 UTC]

Yeah, that's a county thing here. I don't think anywhere in MN is affected though. My cousin has a pitbull, one of my old friends had one and their unlce also bred them. Very nice dogs, just did not like other animals. Well, my cousin's gets along with little kids and cats and stuff but he's always been around them.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Sachriel In reply to Mystofeles [2007-08-02 08:40:40 +0000 UTC]

funny thing is just after the banning of pitbulls happened here a guy was attacked by 2 dogs, first thing stated in the paper was that it wasn't confirmed if they were pitbulls.. next day it was confirmed that they were poodles

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Mystofeles In reply to Sachriel [2007-08-02 15:11:09 +0000 UTC]

Rabid vicious poodles! How does he sleep at night..

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Sachriel In reply to Mystofeles [2007-08-03 08:39:49 +0000 UTC]

very painfully apparently.. they almost completely chewed off his groin

👍: 0 ⏩: 1


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