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riparii — Salt
Published: 2013-02-03 23:11:14 +0000 UTC; Views: 803; Favourites: 30; Downloads: 2
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Description
Before you were readyyou took to the sea
and I smiled at you
with the fine white teeth
of a shark
Before I was ready
your hands harbored me
in deep water and stars
where my wrinkled soul
swaying and slow
opened its foam-grey eyes
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Comments: 47
"in deep water and stars
where my wrinkled soul
swaying and slow
..."
This part really appeals to me, about the swaying slow. Reminds of the work of John Bauer for some reason. Something about the way the words sound and the story they portray. Well done.
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Thanks so much, and I will have a look at John Bauer's work.
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Hi! I used the title of your poem in a found poem made of titles! 
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Goodness I wouldn't want you to do that!
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Your wonderful work has been showcased here, dear: [link]
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Hi lovely, I incorporated the title of your wonderful poem in a poem of my own. It's for the found poem challenge using titles of other deviations. - [link]
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It flirts with the mind like music and stains the eyes like a painting.
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Oh, beautifully put, thanks you.
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This has some delectable imagery--particularly fine white shark teeth and foam-grey eyes, though I'm also fond of the deep water and stars. Nicely evocative. Makes me want to head to the sea
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I always want to head to the sea though it rarely happens.
Thanks.
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I know that feeling. Though with several beaches within a half-hours drive, I really have no excuse...
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I wouldn't say exactly that, but thanks, Indiana.
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Before I was ready
to comment, I swear
I'd encountered such words
before
(this is lovely)
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I steal from that bitch all the time.
Thank you Raquel.
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I hope you remember to kick her and take her milk money, too
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You should see what I say about her on Facebook too.
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I bet that really keeps her in her place
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Won't sit with her at lunch either.
On a tangential note, my niece unfriended her own (21-year-old) son
on Facebook because he kept posting stuff that freaked her out and she
couldn't keep from bitching at him for it and then he would get pissed
at her for butting in, speaking of butts, and so, she just went ahead
and unfriended him.
His very own mother.
These Modern Times.
Just thought I'd share that.
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Unfriending him sounds like a necessary evil. Good mothers make these hard choices.
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foam-grey eyes
I love that so much.
This is so gentle and sweet. Beautiful.
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Aw. Thank you Rachel.
Someday I'll write something raw-edged and gritty.
But not anytime soon.
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I don't reckon there's anything the matter with sweet and gentle. I kinda like grey-eyed things, ya know. A lot. They're kinda my most favoritest things.
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You've got a perfect blend of grit and sweet/gentle in your writing.
One of the reasons I like it so much.
Brown eyes are nice. I'm sure you like brown eyes too.
[link]
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You're flattering me madly, Katie. You better stop it or I'm gonna be a mess to handle today.
My Casey Bear! (: Yes, I am quite in love with that little gal's eyes. She went with me and Heather to town last night to get milkshakes. Best friend, that one.
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She got a wee taste of strawberry before I realized it.
...and Heather may have given her a fingertip tasting of chocolate. Hehe...
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I'm happy you think so, thanks.
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Thank you Jorge, I appreciate that.
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for some reason it made me think of the song "looking east" (jackson browne - david lindley)
well done Katie.
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Ah, that's not one I was familiar with.
I hope Jackson Browne lives forever.
Thank you catch.
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lol it looks as if he might... you're welcome!
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