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shinga — I'm... Alive
Published: 2009-09-22 03:35:36 +0000 UTC; Views: 31300; Favourites: 788; Downloads: 192
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Hi.So, I've been dead.
Well not literally... which would be a better story than the truth, which is just that real life ate me alive. Hell it's STILL eating me alive... everything from being broke as hell (seriously, my account is overdrawn right now... YAY STRESS), unemployed, sick, depressed to the point of near-breakdown and subsequently getting into counseling and on medication, physical injury that's made drawing VERY difficult, my family is going through some rough times...
But, I am alive. And I'm trying my hardest to be myself again.
This drawing right here? This drawing isn't that great. I doodled it while listening to Linkin Park ("Given Up" specifically)... I colored it with crayon... it has faults. Anatomy is just all over the place, coloring was lazy... plus, I didn't bother to scan it (it's too big anyway) and just took a shitty webcam picture of it.
But this drawing right here? Is the first art piece I have been able to complete in MONTHS. It's... it's something of a turning point for me. I'm jobless and stressed and depressed and everything looks hopeless but I'm determined to get back on my feet. This drawing is my way of saying that... to you all, and to myself.
I've missed you, DA. <3
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Comments: 445
Crayon...-is amazed- Wonderful work. Nice to see something hand done, though computer coloring is fun, too 
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Good thing you got back on your feet again, that has got to be the most anorexic girl I have yet seen on DeviantArt. 
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YOU DREW THAT WITH CRAYON! That's awesome! Is there anything special you do to get it down to such an art?
I'm so sorry you're feeling like that! Try your best to think about good things and what good has happened to you. When something good happens, embrace it! Email friends just to chat, take nice long walks outside (be safe though) listening to happy music like 'this is my paradise', and also stay away from sad music. I got really depressed and I didn't know it, then I realized I was listening to depressing song. Hope it helps! *gives hug*
YAY, LINKIN PARK! I love his work!
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Hope everything is going well for you, Ive found myself in the same situation as well, Lack of Passion caused by depression makes it hard to create anything. Great picture.
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Yep. This has been a hell of a year (...few yeas). Keep drawing. Stay alive!
Hopefully, I will live again!
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We're here for you Shinga! And you're still my most favorite artist on DA, I swear to God! You can do it!
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And while I'm looking at this picture I'm listening to Given Up.....epic!
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I really love how intense her face is. There's something very real about the whole pose!
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I think this is pretty good actually, I love her expression and the anatomy looks fine! Especially if you didn't use any reference.
Hope everything is better for you, I know what it's like going through rough times... My advice, as cliche as it may sound, never, EVER give up.
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Hey Shinga,
I don't comment on your artwork much, as much as I adore it, but I wanted to let you know I admire your strength to get through all the shit you've got to go through. Keep it up, we're all rooting for you on DA.
~Facetious-Fiend
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Welcome back!
I have missed your work... I do sneak by every now and then.
Have to empathise with some of what's been going on with your life... reason: click here
There's been a few other issues recently as well... which usually involve money (or lack of)...
Suffice to say, despite their being a anniversary to celebrate... the Yuletide season will be strained to say the least.
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the expression and rainbow background are simply lovely ^^ crayons turn into instruments of doom when i use them.
but usually in the fail, less-violent way sadly.
anyway, nice drawing and glad you're moving forward! keep it up!!
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Great to hear you're still alive. As you can see, there are a lot of people concerned about you.
And I like the picture. It's sexy.
Like you.
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Hey! 
And don't worry... There are times when you can't go further down... You just have to get up.. And if it wasn't the crap, we wouldn't be able to enjoy the good stuff... Just think and act positive...
Get up, put on your favourite CD, get on the couch and start dancing and screaming the lyrics to hell... And then you can go for a walk and see the leaves falling down, and the wind will blow you off, and your hand will freeze to hell and the rain will soak you to flu, but you'll see the autumn twilight, and the early Xmas decorating and all that beautiful stuff... Or just eat a whole box of chocolates... And don't worry about the calories.. In such cases they don't count...
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Sorry to hear it's so rough for you. I hope it all gets better from here!
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Good luck. I'm sorry you're going through some tough times, but I know your strong enough to get through them.
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thats a really good doodle hell that doesn't even look like a doodle your a great artist even when ur not trying
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When I saw this I immediately yelled in my mind OMFG! Yes, that pic you made is amazing. Indeed, it may be a drawing, but I can definitely hear passion and strength crying out from it...
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thia is an awesome drawing ... i'd love to be able to draw like you can
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just come up with a half assed plot, draw a comic book, and let things take their course from there
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I loves you Shinga! Hugs, cake, and....well, the exorbitant amount of money will have to wait...sorry about that. Anyway, glad that you're alive and you're wonderful.
~Isabel
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Showing some love. I adore your work and have spent many a happy hour pouring over it and making little stories for your prints in my head. I do hope you feel better soon. Please continue to make beautiful pictures.
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Wow, how crazy is it that I just HAPPENED to have had "Given Up" randomly stuck in my head as I opened this page?
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so sorry youre not doing well. really am. Hope that you get better soon. But holy crud!- even coming back from the dead you got major talent! Hope to see you better soon (and possibly a new head trip if you feel up to it and have the time?)no jk jk, dont do anything till your ready k?
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lol her lips looked like a goatee in the thumbnail. i was like wtf?
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this piece is lovely, and i love how it looks stylized but realistic all at once! i hope you get back on your feet soon.
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I hope everything gets better! And its a wonderful drawing.
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It's great to hear that things are looking better for you, and this drawing really does look pretty good.
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You claim this is just a doodle and the anatomy is all over the place....it's still f*cking awesome though >.< And with crayons too o.o
Sucks to hear all you've been goin' through 
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looks very cool! telling everyone i am here and stick kicking butt!
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I first was linked to your art sometime in late last year, I'm thinking. Finally getting round to actually commenting on things, so.
I'm sorry you've been doing poorly. You're a brilliant artist, and I hope things are getting better for you. You have my sympathy--I've fought stress and depression all my life.
This is a lovely piece--I like the texture you've achieved with the clothing and hair, in particular.
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Great job! I can't wait to see how you use all the crap and turn it into fertilizer for your own growth.
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I am sorry that things have been sucky for you. I am glad that you're getting treatment though.
I really like this drawing. I'm very impressed that you colored it with crayon!
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Happy you are alive and not a glittering zombie. THings will get better, I am sure. Zen Hugs!
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Your unofficial South African fanclub says Hi
R,T,C&S
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Shinga, I for one am glad that you are alive. Things will get better. ~smiles~ That drawing is wonderful, IMHO. It is almost as if she is singing because the world threw everything at her and she made it through. Keep up the good work and know that we are wanting the best for you!
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how much money do you want for that picture? I will buy it from you.
Hell, I'd buy anything you draw.
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Welcome back, Shinga! I have missed you and your work, but I understand how much of a toll LIFE can take on you. Just keep plugging away and you will get there.
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I've missed HeadTrip dearly, glad to see you've survived!
Also, I like the ruffles on the skirt. Very nice and realistic.
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