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spellbound6000 — The Wolf In My Dreem
Published: 2006-05-01 04:23:08 +0000 UTC; Views: 106; Favourites: 0; Downloads: 2
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Description when i go to bed
i drift in to the land of nod and dreem
where i climb on the clouds
and dance with the moon
and i see your smiling face in the stars
suddenely there you are standing next to me
and with a gust of wind
you are stardust
sentenced to the roam skys
and to meet me in my dreems
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Comments: 7

Cammy-Hearts [2006-05-05 06:33:30 +0000 UTC]

WOW ^-^ how nice and sad, ........... makes me drift

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

spellbound6000 In reply to Cammy-Hearts [2006-05-06 01:10:13 +0000 UTC]

thanx

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Rabidturtle [2006-05-04 00:24:52 +0000 UTC]

Well done You can almost hear strange, ghostly melodies playing in the background, nice job!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

spellbound6000 In reply to Rabidturtle [2006-05-06 21:32:02 +0000 UTC]

thanx

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Rabidturtle In reply to spellbound6000 [2006-05-06 21:47:43 +0000 UTC]

^^

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

BrooklyNinja [2006-05-01 04:40:03 +0000 UTC]

I enjoyed this poem quite a bit. The images in the third and fourth line I really enjoyed.

I do have a few critiques though. In the second line you use "in to" when it should be "into". The 9th line "the roam" perhaps should be "roam the" and it is spelled "skies". Finally, unless it was intentional (in which case forgive me) it is spelled "dream".

There is certainly something about this poem that grabs me though, or else I would not put in the time to write you this note. Good start!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

spellbound6000 In reply to BrooklyNinja [2006-05-01 19:55:47 +0000 UTC]

I shall fix that as soon as posible

👍: 0 ⏩: 0