Ratros [2012-11-13 02:31:59 +0000 UTC]
*le gasp* ...so....really? Most people at least get the first chapter done before they start the what if stories. I wouldn't complain so much, since I do like them, but the fact of the matter is that you have written more of the what ifs then the first book.
The descriptions of the place are okay, giving you enough to picture the basics, but could still use some work. I like the idea of this what if, and am eagerly awaiting the next chapter.
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