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Yokoboo — InsertCleverTitleHere
Published: 2014-11-12 20:41:38 +0000 UTC; Views: 2732; Favourites: 173; Downloads: 0
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So one of the things I do when I find myself dealing with depression and particularly harmful thoughts is I'll either write about it, or write about why I'm not going to give into it. After some prodding by a close friend, I gave into peer pressure and turned my most recent monologue into a short comic....It's not really short. It's over thirty panels.
Anyway, here it is. Maybe it'll help someone. There's lots of reasons to not give into depression, this is just my one of many self-learned firewalls against it. It works in conjunction with other things, and it's certainly not one of the most positive reasons (it's kind of neutral at best), but it has been effective for me in the way that I deal with my inner demons.
I don't know that it came out the way I wanted it to. Honestly I have a lot of problems with the visuals, but one of the things I'm always telling my friends is that it doesn't matter if it's perfect, the point is to finish it and move on. So mostly this is me trying to not be a hypocrite. I'm also a huge perfectionist so... not taking this slow and doing every step "right" was really hard. But I'm also trying to make myself not care so much, as my caring often gets in the way of finishing things. Also by the time I finished doing the refined sketches, I knew if I didn't finish all in one sitting, I was not going to finish it, simply because a lot of the visual aspects bothered me that putting it down was going to mean I wouldn't pick it up again. So... suffice to say, this is not my favorite art piece ever, but I did finish it and that's something to be proud of.
I'm really rusty with comic paneling and composition, but hopefully it doesn't look too terrible. In any case, I hope you enjoy it.
My favorite part of this is literally the fact that all the characters are wearing onesies.
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Comments: 67
Thank you very much for making this. I feel much better about myself because of what you made. God bless you very much.
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Thank you, I'm glad if this was able to help anyone in any way :3
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Ur work is so amazing and adorable! 😊 I read ur comic by the way and it was really good, I also am reading Daughter of the Lillies as well and love it. Keep up the awsome work 😄👍
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This is BEAUTIFUL. I never thought of confidence/motivation in this way but it makes total sense and is more genuine than anything else I've ever tried. Thank you for making this. <3
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I'm glad you like it :3 And I hope it helps.
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I'm glad if my words helped in any way. You're welcome :3
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its beautiful. I make the same depression rants to my friends and ashamed of it. Tho friends hasn't been a strong factor for me because I felt friendship is not that strong... its based on interests, interests changes, friends changes..
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It doesn't necessarily work for everyone and it does work best when you have strong friendships regardless of your interests. My oldest friendship is a decade long this year, and a lot of my other friendships aren't too much younger than that.
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yeah >.< .. though friends and love are the strongest usually... *grumbles*
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It really depends on the individual. And sometimes "friends" can be just another label for family members- it's simply people you're close to and are familiar with and like.
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I can't tell you enough of how amazing this is. I have felt this sooooo much in my life. The path just feels soooooo long and far away. You worded it perfectly!
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Thank you. I'm glad you enjoyed it :3
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Thank you. I'm glad you enjoy it :3
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You're welcome.
It's a really nice comic ^^
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Have you ever considered talking to the voice that told you you failed? I don't mean like schizophrenically, but more delving into why it was there in the first place?
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Oh, trust me, I've been psycho-analyzing myself for a very long time. So, while I might know the reasons for the way I feel or think of myself, it actually doesn't do very much in combating the actual feelings (which is what I'm assuming you're implying here), at least for me. Understanding thought patterns and how you might end up in a rut of thinking can be helpful if you're actively concentrating on avoiding it, but depression also doesn't care how hard you're working to avoid it.
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Im not really thinking so much fighting it- I'm not saying succumb to them and believe what they're telling you either, I just sort of mean- If anyone said those kind of things to you- maybe you'd tell them to fuck off or whatever and that works but since this is more or less yourself you cant really tell them to go away- they cant and wont. so why not confront them? I'm being serious! Granted I know very little about real psychology -this plus my own experience but I don't know, We develop those voices as part of our defence mechanism when growing up and stuff so at the time they made sense but what about now that they're becoming more troublesome than useful why not ask them why?
Am i making sense?
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It makes sense. And having those conversations with yourself can be useful to the extent of gathering information. But also, once you have that information you more of less need to do something about it if you really want things to change, which is what I meant by "combating".
I have had conversations with myself, sorry if my reply didn't seem that clear. My depression is actually something that I've been dealing with since I was eight, actually. I've had conversations with doctors, been put on medicine, seen therapists, etc etc. For the most part I'm a highly functioning adult and it is pretty much under control. The purpose of creating this comic was to share a bit of my experience in the hopes that it might help someone else struggling with similar problems.
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my deepest sympathies, truly
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specially when in that moment of wanting to give in, to those hard times and just stay on the ground, it is so sooo good to get such input as your comic to actually keep going. I'm currently testing for myself some methods that are hopefully longterm working for me, to keep going, to actually do things, to try to not be perfect all the time, but to just go and to appreciate every little step I do, instead of just weeping for the finish I "could have had" if I would have tried to be more perfect...which usually means im not finishing things at all, out of fear i can never meet my own expectations...
thank you
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You're welcome, I'm glad you enjoyed my comic and thank you very much for sharing! :3
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I know how it feels. For me, the hardest thing was to say I can't, or I have a problem, to admit I feel horrible and miserable and lost and insignificant and just talk about it. Even with my friends. I was surprised how much support and understanding my friends had about my "bad days" (they were months actually) when I finally talked about it. I learned that I don't have to hide it and pretend like everything is OK because I'm not perfect (perfectionist also) and I'm allowed to do mistakes.
I love it because it's simple enough and straight to the point.
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Thank you. Thank you for sharing and I'm glad you enjoyed it :3
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I shall make sweet sweet love to this comic
it may seem difficult to do now, but the comic itself has given me the will to persevere!
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I'm glad it could help. Good luck!
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Oh yeah! Loving this hard !! Onesies for the win yo !!
Hold on to the despair and misery and negative feels (but not too much) ! I feeds yo beautiful and art !! (at least, it's the case for me ^^' )
I loved the "Look up. Distance. Overwhelming." expression. The feels. I feel you, sis ! :'D
But as a good bro of mine on DA said : (remix it in your beat) "Look back. All the distance you a'ready made. So cool. You da boss. Keep at it. Fax me ;> ** <3 " Ok, that last part, he may have not said. But yeah!
This great! you great! me watch you!
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Thank you . . so much Q_Q;;; *curls into a ball of feels* Thats. . exactly what I needed . .exactly how I feel and agree with everything.
I just gotta refelect teh love I have for others back on myself every now and again. I never finish . . .I caryr but . .maye I need to start going through to the end instead of fearing the horridiness of if it'll even be legit or cool looking.
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I'm glad it could help :3
As for not finishing things... I would suggest trying to distance yourself from the mindset of worrying if something is "cool". What's "cool" is going to change with time and is so fickle that worrying about it is going to be a waste of time for you. Instead maybe try thinking, "Do I like this?" If the answer is yes, then don't worry about anything else. If you like it, then that's reason enough for it to exist and for you to work on it. And maybe sometimes you'll work on things you don't like, but you'll do them anyway (like trying to improve on your skillsets or learning something new, or for work, etc) but that's a different conversation entirely. But if you're working on things that matter to you specifically, don't worry about what other people will think. If you enjoy doing it and you like it, then yes, see it through to the end. Good luck!
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I have a constant struggle with depression. I just feel like nothing I do is ever good enough because even my own friends and family don't even see it, or at least it feels that way. No one talks anymore no one actually interacts anymore and it makes me feel very alone
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If you're struggling with depression and you feel like those around and closest to you are either ignoring it or don't know about it, then it would be best to sit down with them to discuss it and look into treatment options (such as going to see a doctor/psychiatrist/therapist or making adjustments to your current lifestyle). Don't assume that because it's easy for you to see, that it's easy for others to see. Expecting people to behave a certain way or to know things that you know is a set up for reinforcement of negative thoughts when things don't go the way you want them to. Open communication should always be an active tool in your arsenal for fighting depression. And while it does go against the grain for someone suffering from depression, it's important to be active against your depression. It's important to initiate talking with people you trust and give them the opportunity to know your side as well as let you know what they actually do and don't see.
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I don't feel like they either will understand or will blow me off because everyone is in the same boat, shit sucks all around so why am I so special? Or the best part you're not depressed, you're just upset that things suck. I don't know, I guess I really don't trust anyone that well... and I don't want to be on pills or anything I don't want to go through drugs, get addicted or have it mess me up more because you have to go through them till you find something that works. I don't even like pot all that much.
I've had too many people I care about just shrug off how I felt, or you know you gotta deal with it cause this is the way things are and they won't change, and then I hear so many horror stories from other people who suffer depression, that either their doctors, family or friends all just tell them you're not depressed now get off my couch, and while my immediate family isn't like that they don't understand, even though they are depressed too, so we all just kind of have no idea what to do...and I don't want to bother anymore about it.
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Well at this point you have two options. Try talking to your family about it and try to find a solution, or do nothing and let things continue as they've been going. It sucks, because neither one is really pleasant and as much as we want other people to care about us, we have to be the first person to care about what we need.
As for your concerns with doctors and drugs, here's my take away from my experience with it. First, the likelihood of you becoming addicted to drugs specifically for depression is slim. And IF your doctor thinks that medication is a route you should go (because not all depression requires medication to regulate one's life), they ought to be starting you off on the most mild of antidepressants, which are safe enough for children and pregnant women to take. Also, if a doctor, especially a therapist is making you feel worse, then don't go back to them. Their entire job is to help you feel better, and if you need to shop around for one that works for what you need, then do that. That is what most people SHOULD be doing, but don't for various reasons. Also, there is absolutely no shame whatsoever in needing medication/drugs to regulate your life and help balance yourself. It gets a lot of negative stigma surrounding the idea that someone needs medication to feel better every day, but there is nothing wrong with that.
If someone is being antagonistic and telling you that your feelings and thoughts are not valid and you should stop complaining, then let them know that you don't appreciate them trying to invalidate you and that what they think about how you feel does not change the fact that you feel that way. You might also want to tell them how much it means to you to work up the courage to even talk to them about it and trust them with your feelings, and that their negative attitude is going to damage any chances of you coming to talk to them again about anything.
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I do need to get an eye doctor, so I guess I'll see about a therapist this weekend, I still need to find out how my stuff works. I literally can't afford anything that isn't paid by my insurance.
well lol that is kinda why I don't feel safe speaking to them, and my family especially just think's I'm over dramatic, even though they are the ones who cause drama over the dumbest things, and I just plainly state what is going on. I only get frustrated when they refuse to drop it after all is said and done.
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Well there's not much more advice I can give you, but I wish you luck in tackling your problems. I hope you find a good solution and that things get better between you and your family.
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I've fought with depression in the past as well, and I find this to be true. More than any medications or such, friends are what kept me from falling back, and eventually pulling out.
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