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| TheCobaltOcean
TheCobaltOcean
[17702942]
[2011-05-22 21:33:50 +0000 UTC]
"Don't Just draw it, Feel it"
(United Kingdom)
# Statistics
Favourites: 4126; Deviations: 90; Watchers: 35
Watching: 79; Pageviews: 21368; Comments Made: 3422; Friends: 79
# Interests
Favorite movies: Battle Royale?Favorite books: Halo: Ghosts of Onyx, Halo: Cryptum, +...
Favorite writers: Eric Nylund, Anthony Horrowitz, Pittacus Lore, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle (and more))
Favorite games: C&C, Halo etc.
Favorite gaming platform: Xbox 360, PC
Tools of the Trade: Pencils, Rubbers, rulers, pens and a Trust Tablet
Other Interests: Anime, Manga, Games and Novels
# Comments
Comments: 633
thanks so much for the fav!! I really appreciate it!~
awesome gallery btw!~ keep it up!
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No probs', you've got some good stuff going on there!
Ahh thanks, 'preciated!Β
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Thanks for faving my piece 'Commission - Nebulae ', much appreciated!
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Thank you very muchΒ Β Feel free to look through my entire gallery!Β Β Β Β
beccab-323.deviantart.com/gallβ¦
Also, feel free to watch me 
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Thank you for adding my sculpey to your collection
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Thanks for adding my drawing to your collection!
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You're welcome!
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You're welcome!
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Thank you for the favourite on my master chief my friend.Β Always good to speak to another UK user.Β Take care -rich
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No probs', Chief, It's good stuff. Keep at it.
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You're welcome!
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Thank you very much for the fave!~ ^__^
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You're welcome!Β
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You're welcome!
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You're welcome!
Saw your journal by the way, some people, eh?
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You're welcome!
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Thank you so much for your fav' !
Hope you'll like my future work
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You're welcome
I hope others do too!
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You're welcome, it's a nice piece!
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Thank you so much for the fave on The Last Child. It's really long, so thank you for reading.
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Truth be told, I've not finished it yet, I was just making sure I could find it again.
So don't thank me yet
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Ah! ;w;
I'll be curious to hear your thoughts later then.
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Sure sure!
What I will say though, is there is a definite difference between your style and Moffat's or Davies'. Already yours feels slightly darker, a bit Torchwoody if you will (With the slashing and decapitation)but it's definitely a nice crack at it
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Yes! I do lean toward a dark style. I wondered if I was too dark for a Doctor Who episode when I wrote that, but then there was quite a bit of beheading in A Good Man Goes to War with the Headless Monks. But yeah, that still wasn't very . . . bloody.
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Well well, not bad, not bad at all
Pretty nicely done 
However, you've asked for critique so...
*Snaps gloves*
The Doctor, in the show, I believe we've only seen him cry once, during Amy and Rory's untimely departures. In this, seems to be a bit too upset all the time. Yes, I know he was remembering Gallifrey and the time war, but his previous incarnations weren't that... broken up about it (despite him being deeply scarred). I don't know if you saw the episode of the Sarah Jane Adventures called 'The Doctor's Death' or something along those lines, but when Jo Grant spoke about the Time Lords offhandedly (She didn't know about the Time War and was never told), the 11th Doctor paused, but didn't break down. Hell, he event sent them all back in The End of Time. So, maybe something to consider there?
Another thing to consider is pointedly telling people who characters are in relation to The Doctor. We know The Doctor knew Vaelan, but how? She said she left Gallifrey before becoming a Time Lady, yet she knew The Doctor ended the Time War and she fled at the start. So how did she know about him? Not forgetting that a certain Time Lord went around 'purposely removing himself from every known data bank in history'. We also learnt that Vice is a Time Lord too if I understood it correctly, and he was abandoned by Vaelan at the start of the war (Question: Did she use a vortex manipulator to escape?), so how did he get there in sink hole universe? Was he in Ferastoin with Vaelan?
Something's just might need saying in speech just so the readers (Or watchers if it was an actual televised episode [Liking the script layout by the way]) don't have to infer so much
I think that's it. Writing this out, I fear I've missed something massive about the whole story and might have got the wrong end of the stick entirely, but at least the wrong end is still pretty good anyway
A great effort, pat yourself on the back!
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Yeah! You have to keep the story moderately family friendly, In future, maybe less is more if you catch my drift?
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Yep, I understand. That's a big mistake there. It actually gets worse further on.
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Yeah, but I've covered that one now so I'll leave that out of my final thoughts bit which I'm writing now, bare with me
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You're welcome!
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You're welcome!
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