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| Zizela
Zizela
♀️
[18394652]
[2011-07-22 11:05:00 +0000 UTC]
"Zizela"
(Sweden)
# Statistics
Favourites: 2466; Deviations: 315; Watchers: 84
Watching: 179; Pageviews: 28257; Comments Made: 989; Friends: 179
# About me
Welcome here!..
"I think people should maybe just go out into the garden and watch a ladybug crawl across a flower and relax their mind.
That`s about all you need to know about life, I think"
In 2011 I started to process my traumatic experiences through paint abstract mostly because I was in so much pain and hurt so it became a huge silence in my life for many years to not find any words how to tell. I was thinking when I painted I will try to do something about it some day because I felt me judged from the very first time I tried to explain .. my emotional of energys went into every paint or digital abstract or fractal flower as much I learned to to accepted it and stopped try to think do something about it because I am always judged to failed, no matter how I try, I am lost in my life but I never loose the faith of explain it somehow, so during the years I was mostly painted fractels using calculating in fractal programs beside things I was going through. I needed to do that sometimes because things I have been through was really hard to think about, but like my fractal say ”time to be strong”, when I forget because of memory loss but it helped me to stand out.
It helped me to continuing struggle against the powerlessness in my life. I really tried to reach out with my art for helping other to never give up struggling, no matter how hard life is, my heart never give up believing in a better tomorrow.
During the years I was stuck into multi traumatic situations to handle suffering because of my silence to not find words to tell back in time but the secret is just to never give up to find a way to tell, no matter how much I was broken in pieces in my life, fallen down. I have to get through that and keep on struggling, as ladybug and flower says it’s the little things that matter most
so never ever give up.
.. Still ok but, my art is very personal so thats why its not very special interesting ,
so I have lost the inspiration but as my quote says feelings in heart don’t depend on who you are, its the strength of life before everything else was knowing me as feeling you
so my wish is one day to donate my art to help others in some way etc .
I was just trying to deflect or avert the situation of what happend back in my life to not mess up anything ...but in vain...In end of february 2018 socialworker of town in my country was taken away rest of my heart from me ...
I was just accused because I sacrifaced both body and soul to take care of heart and tried to do everything I could for another little human being. well, I knew it before they did...but they continuing doing it anyway so what if my heart dies?
I can not think ...
I started write last year alo beside paint , but it’s more to tell how accused I feel in my life here where I live,ok
well it does not work to visit my blog when I tried to visit it from somewhere else and I can not fix it so it’s nothing to visit, ok
So I am working on my skills to not being so bad in everything I do but I would never being in life so far as still today if I never was doing my art as process of continuing my life, even if it’s really complicated,ok...
well, let say it’s nothing,ok
I hope to get back my inspiration to continue with my fractalart soon.
/ Angelica
.
My other galleries:
fineartamerica.com/profiles/an…
angelica-ng.artistwebsites.com
# Comments
Comments: 527
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Wishing you a belated Happy Birthday Angelica. Sorry it is late.
👍: 1 ⏩: 0
big thnx for the dev-watch 
very nice Gallery you have here
👍: 1 ⏩: 0
Thanks Angeloica for the 
.. and Merry Christmas to you 
👍: 1 ⏩: 0
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