toffelmaus In reply to umer2001 [2006-03-21 23:17:05 +0000 UTC]

you are welcome it is really a very great piece of work!

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toffelmaus In reply to skeetmuffin [2006-03-21 06:11:03 +0000 UTC]

ohhhhh thank you soooo much!!!

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toffelmaus In reply to FiruL33T [2006-03-06 23:05:37 +0000 UTC]

wow you really have a bad feeling about Argentinians... that is sooo sad to hear... i am sooo happy that i started to be proud of germany...
it is sooo sad to hear you talking about Argentinia like that... i mean yeah totally believe it but it is just really really sad!
You really don't seem to be all that happy at all...

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FiruL33T In reply to toffelmaus [2006-03-07 02:41:34 +0000 UTC]

Argentina is in that way... A few days ago, a family was looking for their dog. They leave their dog in a petshop, like a kindergarden for dogs. So, when they came back from holydays, veterinary said to them that their dog died. They thought that was suspicious. So they found that the petshop rob their dog. That happens in 4 petshops which are located in the Avenue, next to my house.
Another one... Today is the second case of a little boy who was killed by his father. Not a beautiful dead. The little boy (8 years old) was murdered by punch from his father. Little persons die often here, by violence. A few months ago, a worker crush his baby (just months of life) to a wall. You know how, he tooks the baby from it legs and he crush it head on the wall... A few days ago, a wife leave her house and 5 kids with her husband. She leave the house because she wanted other guy. The husband, in a nervous attack, murdered his little sons, and then he kill him self... Poor guy... He doesn't what to do to feed his sons, so he shoot them and he comitted suicide... A few months ago, a group of teenagers murdered a delivery boy just for fun. They kill him by punch. That was a few squares from my house. I live in a middle-High wealth neighborhood. And the teenagers were from high society... Here there isn't differences between hig wealth and low wealth. Is all the same thing. Also, there are a lot of murders by traffic. For example, you are pedestrian, you have green light but, a car pass in front of you (car has red light) and he insult you. If you say something he stop his car, put reverse gear. push the brake pedal, he open the door of his car and he shoot you in the face... Simply... That's the Latin Passion. Is not how I feel... Is the reality.
And yeah... I'm not happy. My temperament is very happy. I'm very witty. I have a lot of energy in my veins. But Is very hard to be happy in this place.

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FiruL33T In reply to FiruL33T [2006-03-07 02:53:09 +0000 UTC]

HAhHA Yeah... I don't know, first was a comment, then a question... A little weird... May be I cannot afford all the comments and keep reasoning... I'm always answering all your comments at the same time, I mean, I answer one, and then the next one and so on...

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toffelmaus In reply to FiruL33T [2006-03-07 04:09:29 +0000 UTC]

yeah same here... i think it is quite difficult to keep track of all that...
so lets make it like that... i just answer all in one now...

right now i am about to put some new work up!
I will see how far i will get... i just looked thru all my stuff and found out that i have about a billion pictures worth posting... i will have to decide on a few tho...
well i will see...

well yeah i can totally see how you are just unhappy where you are... when i read all these stories it seems to me like a bad movie...
but well it is reality... that is tooo sad... i don't know what to say on all that... it is just really really sad! and i can't quite believe it... well it is not that i wouldn't believe you... it is just that i can't believe that!!!

I always try to believe in the good part of the humans, even i know there is not much left to believe in... we all should make the world a better place to live in... but honestly i don't know where to start!

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FiruL33T In reply to toffelmaus [2006-03-07 14:32:55 +0000 UTC]

Ah yes... You must start in your heart. Sometimes, I prepare my self to love people. How is that? I think this: "I have to take out the best of each person in my way". How? Spreading love for everywhere. And that works! But is difficult not to feel disapointment first.

Yeah... Is a reallity really sad. I live in a middle-high neighborhood. So here the things are a bit different. Also in the towncenter. You can walk at any time of the day/night and no body will rob you, (there is a minimum percent). Of course if you're walking with a camera in your hands you will be robbed (just at night) and people will do nothing (if people is watching). Here, workers are common people. And most of niggers doesn't work, they rob. They can go to school. But they don't. You know? I lived in a very poor neighborhood by 4 years (I was a bit poor economically talking). I learnt a lot of things about niggers in that place. Why they rob, why they don't go to school, why they do what they do. Is not margination. Margination has no place here. Niggers really love living in bad situation. For they, robbering is the way to get masculinity. Kill someone is really good for they. The same for drugs and alcohol. Is a culture, a custom, a habit. They are really really racist. They hate white people because they think white people is weak. Because they think civilization is a token of weakness. I know them really really much. They taught me how to rob. I was 11 years old, so I didn't know that robbing fruits from some house is bad.
My mother was punched twice time by people from there. Some day, I arrived to my house (I was in the school) and I see how a neighbor punched my mother, I was 13 years old in that momment. So I cannot do nothing.
The history was in this way: my mother met a girl from the opposite sidewalk, they made friends. The girl lived with her mother, father and brothers. She studyed in the school. So she talk (in past) with my mother about culture stuff. My mother teach her. My mother told her about artist, good wine, history, about niggers life, etc... The girl understood. And she opened her eyes, and she wanted a higher education, he wanted dignity, culture, education! Some day, seems this girl saw her family in other manner. And she give the finger to his family, so then, her mother cames to my house and she punched my mother. After that, the girl forgot all things that she learnt. And he begun hate my mother.
I saw horrible things in that neighborhood. I saw fightings, crude fightings with deads. I heard gunshots all the nights. I heard people insulting all the time. I was lucky nothing happen to me. I used to come back very late to my home. No body hurt me never. Of course I cutted my relatiuonship with the guys from that neighborhood. So I just said hello and goodbye.

But today! I live in a very nice place! There are disturbing things, but is not all the time. I can hear the bird's songs I can go to the park, which is a few squares from my house., I have a large backyard. I have the best computer at the momment. I can hear the wind in this momment. Here you can hear the silence, this neighborhood is kinda far from bad zones. Is not a paradise. But I feel good here. Commerce looks good, there is a lot of restaurants here, very very nice restaurants, very glasmorous. I can see very beautifull cars in the streets, people looks different here, people here is bad too but at least they looking good. This neigborhood is almost a country apart. I live here since August 2004.

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FiruL33T In reply to FiruL33T [2006-03-08 01:50:02 +0000 UTC]

Oh... I told you about what I'm doing... But I guess that mail disappeared. Ok... Here we gooooo!!

I started with a Yamaha PSR 530 composing "music" in 1996 (I have records from that Then, I bought a drumm. I started playing Nirvana, then White Zombie, then Metallica (just the "justice for all album"), then Pantera, then Cannibal Corpse, then Suffocation, then Cryptopsy. So, in 1999 I formed a Death Metal band called "Sadistik Kill". I played with them by 2 years, then I formed another band (Brutal Death), but we cannot get excellent music performers. If you don't know, Brutal Death is a kind of music very very sophisticated. I played drumms for 6 years, I went to the Musci Conservatory for 3 years, and I took music composition classes with a proivate teacher for 3 years more. In all that time I tried to join in the University. I tried for 4 years to get in. The last year, I had to talk with teachers, and they show me a report with all the things which I cannot get in the University. One of the teachers grabbed my face and she said something about my eyes and my face. She said "You're eyes are too stare and your face too much rigid, I think you hate us". And I really didn't hate them. I have a particular face and a particular eyes, you can see my neutral face here [link] is photoshoped, but, basically, is my natural face. Women fear me (again my stare), and teachers can't get what I'm thinking. Because, here you have to be like the rest. If you not, they watch you. Also, I say all what I think. I said them Communist! (because they are), but in a delicated manner. I apreciate them, but they can't afford differents points of view than they have. So, I joined in Music Composition University. Then, I left the fucking University.
I composed a symphony for a friend's book. I was 10 months composing. The symphony has two CD of music. Oh, I played Violin for two years and half and I did some electronic music. Well done music, of course. I did all this things between 1999 - 2006. From the year 2000 I started using Photoshop an I continue. Now, I will join to an school to study photography. And I will work as photographer. Also, I'm in my third year learning English. My father is harrassing me to study for PC technic. Because I learnt a lot about computers, using computers and reparing computers, so I Have never had to take my PC to a technician. But I don't want to study that because there are other courses that I don't want to learn. So I'm living a violent momment with my father. Well... He isn't my real father, he's my step father, hangnail. My biological father is Graduated in Music Composition. And he's in San Marino, Italy.

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toffelmaus In reply to FiruL33T [2006-03-09 01:45:59 +0000 UTC]

your face reminds me to keanu reeves... you know? the matrix dude...
uhh he is amazing... i love his face... i think he is amazing... i think that is mostly because i love matrix!

do you still have contact with your real father?

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FiruL33T In reply to toffelmaus [2006-03-09 02:40:57 +0000 UTC]

Did you see me similar to Kean Reeves??? In what photo! I mean, I have so many expressions...

I used to see my father since I born until I was 2 years old. But I didn't live with him. Also, I didn't know that he was my father. My mother told me that he was my father when I was 23 years old. Here is the link to my father web site: [link] You can see his face and listen music that he composed (he plays the grand piano), now he has about 45 years old. His name is Néstor Boher. I used to send some e-mails to his website, but seems like a dead website...

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toffelmaus In reply to FiruL33T [2006-03-09 03:14:11 +0000 UTC]

ohhh that is sad... did you ever talk to him? like called him or anything?

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FiruL33T In reply to toffelmaus [2006-03-09 03:46:52 +0000 UTC]

nothing... There is a long history belong to it... My mother was 35 year old, my father just 21 years old. His mother didn't agree with them, so, his mother send him to Italy and she prohibited to anybody give any information about him to anybody. So I never knew my father's relatives. But is not so sad for me. If my father was with me, of course I would have a better life. But well, history had to start with me

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toffelmaus In reply to FiruL33T [2006-03-07 22:49:28 +0000 UTC]

well that is really really disturbing what you write.... i always read all of it but well i don't really know what to say to all that... i am glad you tell me all these stories because it makes me get to know some stuff about how the life is over there. i really didn't imagine it being that bad.... and well it really makes me kinda happy i have this great life i have... i have everything i want and i am not lacking anything... i am sooo blessed... that is really really great! thank you for telling me all that!
I am glad you got out of this neighborhood and you live in a nice house now!
other than seeing all these bad things, how has you life been lately and what are you doing besides PM?

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toffelmaus In reply to FiruL33T [2006-03-06 22:55:02 +0000 UTC]

is that a question? or are you just telling me that... i had that drawn for a while and because of my math teacher... i will check out your gallery tho!

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toffelmaus In reply to FiruL33T [2006-03-04 21:24:19 +0000 UTC]

hehe i never noticed that...
actually i don't really like war games...
first of all my mom ever hated them and well now i kinda get to the point where i understand her... it is just that if you play these games war becomes more and more a common thing... you are just used to it ... and that it happens but for me war is really really evil i hate war and i would never start one because i think there can always be a better way
well maybe that sounds blueeyed or naiv or something but in my eyes they should just get rid of all the weapons. I don't understand why humans started hating each other that much and killing each other for no reason! or stupid reasons!
I can't see how soldiers can kill the enemy... all of them had a life and a familie or friends who will cry about them!
i think war is just really really really sad... and i know that most people can see the difference between a game and real life... but anyways... i think it is also sad that so many people like killing others in games... i don't say i have never played such games because i did... but when i come and think about it... it is just sad that so many people like playing war!

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FiruL33T In reply to toffelmaus [2006-03-05 03:15:06 +0000 UTC]

I really do like war games!!!! I get your point and the point of your mother. I hate war. But I really do love playing game wars. A contradiction! yes! But I'm human! I loooooooveeeeeeee it!
You're right. War is stupid. But oh girl... I cannot reject all that war sounds... War is among to men. I know that war is something very sad. I cry a lot watching Stalingrado, a war German movie.
War has to be just a video game
Women are among to peace. So women has to pacify men. That's one of the female roles. And there isn't a woman near me... So... War 'em all!!!

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