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Description
Summary: Tim gives up and finally embraces the cruelty and unfairness of life.
Warnings: AU, mpreg

When Conner got to Tim's hospital suite, it was a bit different from the last four times he was there. And the last four times he was there, just like now, the room felt like a wake in a chapel. The only thing different was Tim wasn't crying his heart out in pain, which made Conner worry even more.

Bruce and Clark were sitting on a sofa opposite Tim's bed, looking at Tim worriedly. "He hasn't said a word," said Clark, watching Conner enter the room.

Like the last four times, Bruce and Clark were the first ones there. Dick and Roy with their daughter Lian would come soon after, then Jason, and then Damian. But today, Bruce and Clark didn't let them come. It wasn't that they didn't want them to have anything to do with Tim; they're just worried about how Tim would react if he saw all of them there.

Conner saw Tim in the hospital gown, seeing a little bit of Tim's skin show through the untied gown. He was sitting on the edge of the bed, looking out the window. The usual IV was on his left hand, and the dripping sound was getting on Conner's nerves. He never really liked hospitals. No one liked its white walls, and fluorescent lights. Even though the nurses were kind, they could never really know what it's like, to be there on the bed, sick or dying. And nobody, not even him, would ever be able to know what Tim really felt.

He approached Tim, and moved in front him. "Tim…" said Conner brokenly, seeing Tim's eyes so dull and lifeless, looking blankly at him, at nothing. He touched Tim's pale cheek, tracing Tim's cheek with his thumb, and wrapped his arms around him to pull in into his chest, to just let him know he was there, and he loved him no matter what.

Tim didn't move, didn't speak, and just let Conner do what he wanted. He held him, and it was like Conner wanted to cry for him, to just lift everything off of Tim's shoulders, because to him, nobody deserved happiness more than Tim did.

"It's not fair," Tim said finally, barely a whisper, just loud enough for Conner to hear, but it was also loud enough for their parents to catch. He returned Conner's embrace, clinging onto him tightly as the tears flowed down his pallid cheek.

Bruce squeezed Clark's hand, as if feeling Tim's pain. Clark squeezed back, and tried to say something to comfort Bruce, but nothing came out of his mouth. For the past five years they've seen Tim like this, and there was nothing they could do.

"I know it's not fair, I know," Conner whispered back, placing a chaste kiss on Tim's temple.

"It's not fair…"Tim sobbed into Conner's shoulder, finally letting go of what he felt building up in chest. "I don't want to do this anymore, Kon…I can't do it anymore…I give up…" he tried not to lose it, but he couldn't. "So many people everyday…having children they don't want and we can't even have one…"

Conner, too, couldn't help but cry.

Bruce stood up and left the room. Clark followed him. He'd heard it so many times before. Tim cried to him whenever he remembered the pain of losing a child. Maybe he couldn't stand it anymore, to hear Tim just completely break down, without any more hope of having a child he and Conner craved for. And maybe the real reason why he didn't let Tim's older brothers come was that…Tim would remember that Dick had a daughter. And maybe Five times, Tim lost his children. His first was premature, but died shortly after. And the next four were miscarriages, not lasting through the first term.

It was one of Tim's fears that Conner would divorce him for being unable to give him children. But Conner reminded him, that it was one of their vows that they'd stay together, for better or for worse. And Tim believed him.

Description
Summary: Tim gives up and finally embraces the cruelty and unfairness of life.
Warnings: AU, mpreg

When Conner got to Tim's hospital suite, it was a bit different from the last four times he was there. And the last four times he was there, just like now, the room felt like a wake in a chapel. The only thing different was Tim wasn't crying his heart out in pain, which made Conner worry even more.

Bruce and Clark were sitting on a sofa opposite Tim's bed, looking at Tim worriedly. "He hasn't said a word," said Clark, watching Conner enter the room.

Like the last four times, Bruce and Clark were the first ones there. Dick and Roy with their daughter Lian would come soon after, then Jason, and then Damian. But today, Bruce and Clark didn't let them come. It wasn't that they didn't want them to have anything to do with Tim; they're just worried about how Tim would react if he saw all of them there.

Conner saw Tim in the hospital gown, seeing a little bit of Tim's skin show through the untied gown. He was sitting on the edge of the bed, looking out the window. The usual IV was on his left hand, and the dripping sound was getting on Conner's nerves. He never really liked hospitals. No one liked its white walls, and fluorescent lights. Even though the nurses were kind, they could never really know what it's like, to be there on the bed, sick or dying. And nobody, not even him, would ever be able to know what Tim really felt.

He approached Tim, and moved in front him. "Tim…" said Conner brokenly, seeing Tim's eyes so dull and lifeless, looking blankly at him, at nothing. He touched Tim's pale cheek, tracing Tim's cheek with his thumb, and wrapped his arms around him to pull in into his chest, to just let him know he was there, and he loved him no matter what.

Tim didn't move, didn't speak, and just let Conner do what he wanted. He held him, and it was like Conner wanted to cry for him, to just lift everything off of Tim's shoulders, because to him, nobody deserved happiness more than Tim did.

"It's not fair," Tim said finally, barely a whisper, just loud enough for Conner to hear, but it was also loud enough for their parents to catch. He returned Conner's embrace, clinging onto him tightly as the tears flowed down his pallid cheek.

Bruce squeezed Clark's hand, as if feeling Tim's pain. Clark squeezed back, and tried to say something to comfort Bruce, but nothing came out of his mouth. For the past five years they've seen Tim like this, and there was nothing they could do.

"I know it's not fair, I know," Conner whispered back, placing a chaste kiss on Tim's temple.

"It's not fair…"Tim sobbed into Conner's shoulder, finally letting go of what he felt building up in chest. "I don't want to do this anymore, Kon…I can't do it anymore…I give up…" he tried not to lose it, but he couldn't. "So many people everyday…having children they don't want and we can't even have one…"

Conner, too, couldn't help but cry.

Bruce stood up and left the room. Clark followed him. He'd heard it so many times before. Tim cried to him whenever he remembered the pain of losing a child. Maybe he couldn't stand it anymore, to hear Tim just completely break down, without any more hope of having a child he and Conner craved for. And maybe the real reason why he didn't let Tim's older brothers come was that…Tim would remember that Dick had a daughter. And maybe Five times, Tim lost his children. His first was premature, but died shortly after. And the next four were miscarriages, not lasting through the first term.

It was one of Tim's fears that Conner would divorce him for being unable to give him children. But Conner reminded him, that it was one of their vows that they'd stay together, for better or for worse. And Tim believed him.