cupil [2014-09-13 05:59:26 +0000 UTC]
Here starts a whole lot of trouble. Design wise you did quite well with Barx and Jojo. Barx especially, since I have a poor habit of overlooking the many traits of his species. It's accurate that Jojo would just be very quiet and withdrawn at this point, since this probably takes place close to when he was initially forced to come along with Barx.
The character interaction is quite tense, and it's easy to see the fault on both sides. What Barx said wasn't at all malicious, so Naga went(will) go too far in her reaction, but Barx could've went about it in a less brash and rude way. I like that you got that aspect of his character, where he'll be such a punk around those that rub him the wrong way.(especially showed when he was forced to work with Dragofymon)
thanks for including them in your story.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0