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SnowRaven-Moonstar — the travellers - exerpts
Published: 2010-10-14 23:40:45 +0000 UTC; Views: 759; Favourites: 0; Downloads: 4
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Spider




The new moon was quartering but still yet at the crescent, the insane grin of a mad god hung in the sky as if it knew something was about to change…or arrive…or be born. Adria could feel something in the wind. Something different, something new but not something she could put her finger on. She sat watching a spider spin its web by moonlight as she waited and did her best to ignore the mocking moon. It made her feel uneasy. The grin-like crescent of the quarter moon always made her uneasy and it was no different this time. For some reason it always felt to her like it knew something she did not. She did not want to think what it might know tonight. She feared the insanity the moon might bring with it.


"Adria." she jumped and looked to see Vreena, her mother's sister gesturing for her to follow. With a final glance at the moon, Adria followed the older woman to where the others were waiting.


Adria sighed and looked up at the moon. She frowned at that insane grin. So all along the moon had known this and had mocked her with its knowledge as she wanted to learn the truth. She turned her head away feeling faintly angry. This was not fair. But then…when had anyone ever told her that life was fair?


The air was damp and fresh. A light rain had fallen while she had talked with the elders. In the faint light from the smug moon Adria saw that the spider had fled its web in the face of the rain and was likely hiding close by until it was and dry enough to emerge. With a faint jolt she noted that the web sparkled with rain drops as if it were a piece of expensive jewellery. It seemed that somehow the drops had gathered particularly densely at the centre of the web and larger drops had caught on the outer edges as if it were mimicking a much greater and older web, as if it sought to mimic the Web of Worlds Itself. Adria felt her stomach flip. Suddenly she wondered if it was not just the moon but all of nature that had secretly known and now mocked her. She would give up her life to walk the Web and leave behind all she knew, her family, her best friend, everything. Perhaps others would gather around her but they would be people she did not know and people forced to give up what they had known to answer a Call they could not easily deny. It would be better to travel alone, she thought, than take people away from what they knew as she must leave behind all that she knew. She would never ask anyone to follow her. She made that vow now. If she was to be the Spider, she would be like the true creatures from which the name was taken, solitary, alone in the Web. Now…she must begin her farewells. When her people readied to leave for the winter she must be ready to start her own journey.





Fox


In his bed safely protected by his father's castle keep, Prince Rhys awoke with a start. He had been having a strange dream but could only remember that it was strange, not what the details of it had been. He lay still and stared at the shadow shrouded ceiling though he could only make out the broad beams in the dim light from the dying embers of his fire. It was cold. Very cold. Grumbling he climbed from his bed and crossed the cold stone floor to stoke the fire.


A sharp cry caused him to jump. He looked up and spotted the reason his room was so cold even though it was not yet autumn. The window was open. He could not remember opening it before he went to bed, though he had not checked to make sure it was closed either. A damp smell of earth and grass and rain wafted in on a light breeze. The cry repeated itself and he realized he recognised it. Just beyond the walls of the castle, a fox was calling. Its sharp cry had wakened him. As he listened the call came temporarily closer, sharp, staccato and clear. As he listened he heard another call farther off. The closer fox answered and then as he listened he heard the cries fade off and finally fall silent. He wondered, strangely, if what he'd heard had been some sort of omen. Annoyed with himself and such thoughts he sharply closed the window shutters and returned to his bed but he had glimpsed the new moon shining in the sky like a gleaming sickle. For some reason he could not explain the sight made him uneasy. He dived under the bedcovers and pulled them up over his head determined to return to the safety of sleep even if it meant returning to that strange half remembered dream. He did not want to think of what these things might mean – if they meant anything at all. Jut before sleep claimed him again he had a final thought, a wish really that all that he had just experienced was the dream and that none of it was real at all. For some reason he feared that if they were true things that it meant something had changed and though he did not know what it meant it gave him great unease…




Wolf


Micah Kobayashi rolled over in his bed and glanced at the clock. For f*** sake it was 3:18am. He had to be up in just a few hours. He pulled the covers over his head to block out the glare of the alarm clock and tried to concentrate on getting back to sleep. He hated getting up in the early hours of the morning and losing those few hours of sleep. If he was going to be helping customers at the bookstore he did not want to look half asleep. He took pride in his work ethic and his appearance at work was part of that.


Outside one of the neighbours' dogs howled. To his frustration the other neighbourhood dogs took up the cry until it seemed that his house was surrounded by singing, howling wolves. He pulled the covers down from his eyes and spotted a sliver of light peering in through a crack in the curtains. He groaned and climbed out of the bed. He had left the window open to get some air. It was still warm at night even though autumn was fast approaching. He drew back the curtains to close the window and spotted the slowly waxing new moon. It seemed to be balancing on the apex of his neighbour's roof. The dogs went abruptly silent and he ran both hands through his dark hair in frustration. He decided to close the window anyway and put on the fan this one time…though he would have preferred to save the energy. If the dogs started up again he didn't' want to have to listen to them. He had to be up soon. He wanted to get those last few precious hours of sleep before he had to be up and getting ready to work. Was it too much to ask to get a full night's sleep on a workday? Why did it feel like this was different though? Why did things feel like they had all shifted slightly to the left? He dismissed it as a hallucination brought on by being only half awake. Maybe even the dogs had been a dream. He crawled back into bed and fell immediately back to sleep.






Serpent

Bella Rose capped the vial and put it safely away with the others. She smiled slightly and ran a finger down the smooth body of her companion. The bright green and black snake curled itself around her shoulders and tightened itself a little closer like an embrace. She smiled to herself. Her poisons and venoms were always useful and she kept them well hidden. Occasionally she acted as the Belladonna and passed the poisons to someone who needed such a thing or slipped it into a drink. None ever suspected the lovely, elegant and refined – not to mention exclusive and expensive – Bella Rose of being more than she seemed. Playing Bella Rose was often just a means to an end but either as Bella Rose or as Belladonna she got paid a great deal of money for the unique talents she offered. There was a reason that people whispered in fear of the Belladonna though of course none knew who the lady was. And no one better ever learn who she was or there would be worlds of trouble for Bella Rose to deal with.



She stood and crossed her room to the luxurious balcony that overlooked the ancient and sprawling city in which she plied her trades. She leaned against the balustrade languidly and gazed down at the lights below. Without warning Fen tightened her coils and let out a startling hiss. Bella did not think she had ever heard the snake make such a sound before. Afraid she might strangle if the snake tightened anymore, Bella pulled the snake from about her neck and let it wrap itself about her arm instead.


There was a curious smell on the air though Bella could not identify it. It was both sweet and pungent like a perfume but she knew that wherever it came from it could not have come from near by. Perhaps it was this that had upset Fen.


She turned to go back in, finding the scent cloying, but as she did she caught a glimpse of the moon from between two towers, hanging there as if suspended. For a moment she thought it seemed as if a cat grinned at her. She shivered and quickly closed the expensive glass doors and for the first time locked them though none could ever climb the tower to her apartments and climb in through her balcony. She then drew the drapes, lit the lamps and dropped down in her chair. Fen slithered away to wrap herself around one of the posts at the foot of Bella's bed. Bella dropped her face into her hands feeling ill. She wondered for a moment if what she had smelled had been some sort of poison, but dismissed the thought immediately. No…it was as if she felt a moment of vertigo on the balcony she realized…a faint moment where she thought she could pitch right over the balustrade to her death far below. What a way to end such a promising career. She was not sure what had given her the feeling and yet…she lifted her head realizing something shocking…hadn't the moon been full just two days before? She surged to her feet and returned to the window. She opened the drapes just enough to peer out. She could not see the moon now. It must have been her imagination; an illusion caused by the way the buildings stood perhaps, a reflection on a window maybe, or a hallucination brought on by whatever had made her feel dizzy. Certainly the moon was not there now…the impossible crescent moon that could not have been.


She felt suddenly very weary. She turned away from the window and decided to go to bed. Glad that she had no clients waiting for her tonight she decided she would bathe and then sleep. Surely by tomorrow she would be feeling better. It was likely she had just eaten something that did not agree with her. After all…her profession did involve a great deal of sampling unusual and decadent delicacies. That was the most likely explanation she decided. She would put herself to bed and by tomorrow she was sure she would feel better. She would then be able to dispense the remedies she prepared for those neighbours who knew her skills with various herbs, simples and possets and then prepare herself for her more exclusive trade afterward. Yes…that was all that was needed. Tomorrow she would laugh at herself.





Owl


The High Priestess Vanya perfumed her long braided hair and then covered it with the gauzy flowing veil. This night when the moon was newly waxing she would look into the spring and see what visions might be offered her. She would be let alone as she was always for those days when the moon waned from silver sliver to dark and then waxed new again. The small shrine which sheltered the spring and kept most refuse out was a half hour's walk from where she lived and slept. But she looked forward to the walk in the fresh air growing slightly sharp as autumn drew on. She hoped for visions that would either help her and her Sisters and Brothers or that would help the people. She hoped for visions that could be readily interpreted rather than the sort that were obscure and needed much thought and contemplation to understand. She hoped for many things of course, but she would have to take what was given her.




She knelt at the water's edge and waited for the moon to become centred so that it peered like an eye through the hole in the roof of the shrine. Gazing into that eye, Vanya would be able to see farther and clearer than ever she could with her own eyes or even her own inner sight. The moon at these times granted visions to those who had the Sight if one only knew how to look. As she waited she drank a soothing tea to calm and still her mind and to help clarify it and clear the fog of daily life from it. She folded back her veil allowing the eye of the moon to see her face more clearly and waited; gazing at the water, as the moon's eye slowly came into view on the water.




In the corners spiders spun their webs. She could hear them even though they worked in silence even as she spun thread in silence during the days when she went into seclusion. In her mind flashed other creatures, birds and animals…all together even though they were strange companions. She could hear in her ears the sharp bark of a fox and from much farther away the singing of a wolf. It felt as if something coiled about her leg and in her mind she saw a jewel bright serpent. It showed sharp fangs dripping with venom but did not bite. She saw the bright disk of the sun in her mind's eye like a giant watchful eye that never blinked. It was as if she saw it from much closer…as if she saw it from the point of view of a creature far above the earth. She imagined strong wings and a buffeting wind tamed by the power of those wings…or perhaps embraced by them. A scream shattered the air but not a human scream. It was followed by a strange chirruping and then silence but for a dull roar which resolved into a familiar sound...the sound of a burning fire…she had heard the sound at many bonfires over the years. She imagined she could feel its heat and felt that if she turned she would find herself standing before it but this time she got no impression of a living creature…though it seemed that there was something at the heart of the fire stirring…shifting, something she could sense but not see.


A hiss, screech and then soft hooting brought her back to herself. She started and tilted her face away from the pool of water. A pale shadow drifted silently down over her head, nearly touching the crown of her hair. The soft hooting repeated and she watched as she shadow-y owl drifted away in silence. The owl had called her back before the images had consumed her and she sent gratitude in its direction. She glanced back at the spring. The moon had moved and was no longer hanging in the centre but it was still that gleaming sickle that had always reminded her of a smiling eye watching her even as she watched it. She stood and pulled her veil back over her hair. There was a chill in the air and she felt faintly dizzy. She crouched again to drink from the spring as was her right and then began the walk back to the temple eager for a proper sleep. She had spent too many days in meditation never fully drifting into proper sleep. She felt she had earned the rest. She would determine the full meaning of what she had seen, what the moon had shown her, when she was clear minded.






Ravens


"Excuse me, sir, I'm sorry to bother you…I was wondering if you had any eardrops…in red?" The man behind the table gave her a long look. Branwen let her smile widen slightly and put an innocent look in her eyes. She knew she looked like she had enough money to afford anything he offered her without looking like someone who would bring servants or body guards with her. A merchant's daughter perhaps. Still she saw suspicion in the man's dark eyes. This made her wary but this was the final mark for the day.


"We have several different kinds of stone. Are you looking for a darker red, opaque, translucent?"


"Can I see several different pairs?" The man's eyebrows lifted but he obliged her.


"Let's see. This pair are blood garnets…" she could see where they got their name. They were like little drops of crystallized blood. "Carnelian," opaque stone with a translucent shine, rubies, internally lit sunstone, fire opal…such a shame not to actually be buying any of these…


A shout came from one of the other stalls. Branwen spun, allowing her sleeve to sweep the jewels off the table and onto the ground. She felt several slip down her sleeve. Perfect. A young man with dark hair not so different from her own hurried over.


"Oh, I'm so sorry…I didn't' mean to startle you like that, miss…" she smiled, a glance passed between them unnoticed by the merchant. The young man crouched and started scooping up the pieces of jewellery that had fallen. The pieces less likely to be missed he slipped down his own sleeve. They exchanged swift grins unseen by the merchant. He then stood, returning what had fallen and not been slipped into his sleeves back to the table.


"Forgive me, I came to find you. Your fiancé has been looking for you."


"Oh? Oh dear…the sun is setting." She turned to face the merchant, "I must apologise for wasting your time. I didn't realize how late it was. No wonder my fiancé is looking for me." The merchant looked nonplused but did not argue with her. She smiled and then turned away and started making her way between the stalls. She needed to get out of the bazaar before the merchant noticed that anything was missing. Hopefully he would think it just mixed in with all that had fallen on the ground and not noticed until Branwen and Corbin were both long gone. Once they were out of view of the merchant Corbin grabbed his Branwen by the hand and the two of them hurried away from the gild tables. They rounded a corner and scooted down an alley. They came out the other side laughing.
"I wasn't sure he was going to take you seriously," Corbin told her. Branwen pulled the veil off her black hair and grinned. Her nearly golden eyes crinkled at the corners.


"You don't have confidence in my acting skills?" Corbin shook the jewels out of his sleeves and slid them into a pouch at his waist. She retrieved those few pieces from her own sleeve and dropped them in with Corbin's bounty.


"I have every confidence in you, my dear sister…but you and I are not nobles and some of those merchants can spot an imposter from a mile away."


"I could go back to selling lace, you know."


"Of course…if only the gild would take you but they won't and they won't let you sell it without being a part of it…" They started down the streets toward the inn known as the Silver Crescent. The sun was setting now and the lamp lighters were scurrying about to get the lamps lit before the streets were plunged into darkness. Of course where the Crescent was the taverns and inns all had their doors flung open most of the night so there was some light in an area that would otherwise be dark and dangerous. Tomorrow they would meet their contact and fence what they had snatched. The inn owner would claim a portion of their bounty for allowing them to conduct business on her premises and for their rooms and then they'd have to figure out a new target.


"I often wonder if she also takes a portion for allowing us to use the kitchen door for our comings and goings," Branwen commented, "and for allowing us to use the back stairs rather than making us go through the common room like everyone else." Corbin raised a dark eyebrow at her but he smiled.




The sickle-moon shingle hung over the door drew Branwen's eyes as they approached the inn. The image for the first time hit her almost as if someone physically struck her. She froze and stared at it and for a moment it felt like the entire world lurched under her feet. She swayed and felt Corbin catch her.


"Branwen…" he held her up and she straightened herself before looking at him. The way he was looking at her made her stomach turn over. She pushed him away and brushed at her skirt.


"I'm fine…I just…felt dizzy for a moment. I haven't eaten much today. We should hurry…" He gave her a long look but then slowly nodded. As they hurried away toward the back of the inn she could not help but glance back at the sign swaying slightly above the door of the inn. Something flipped in her stomach again but she pushed it away. Surely she'd feel better after she ate something.




No one looked up as they made their way through the busy kitchen and up the stairs. They made their way up to the top floor and in through the first door as soon as they set foot on the floor. Branwen closed and locked the door while Corbin tossed the pouch of filched jewels onto the table and then threw himself down on the bed and buried his face in the pillow, apparently forgetting what had happened below much to Branwen's relief.


"Tandy is going to be sending our food up shortly. She saw us come in…" Corbin grunted acknowledgement but didn't answer. "And sit up," she snapped, "or at lest change. You're going to rumple your cloths and if we need them again you wont' have any way to iron them."


"Tandy will do it."


"Yeah…and charge us an extra two percent for the service." She sat down in the room's only chair and glared at him. Corbin sighed and sat up. He looked at his sister with sulky eyes. She often forgot that he was the younger of them…until he gave her looks like that.


"Don't look at me that way…we need to think what we're going to do next."


"We were talking about lace before…"


"Yes but…I can't sell any of mine…or…wait…." A slow grin slowly spread over her face and her dark eyes glittered like onyx… "I have it…the guild never knew me very well…they won't recognise me…or you…a little revenge for the way they treated me…and you…and our parents…and then I can sell some of mine along with what we can get our hands on…and…wait…I'll have to talk to one of Vel's people but…there might just be a market for lace after all…my lace…independent of the guild…though…it will take work to make it happen…" she leaned forward, "but if it works we'll be bringing in money regularly rather than whenever we manage to flitch something."


"Hmm…" Corbin gave her a long thoughtful look, "you are too young to have that kind of glitter in your eye, my sister," Corbin told her. She grunted and sat back in the chair.


"I'm going to go change. You should too…let me know when the food comes." She abandoned the chair and slipped through the door into the adjoining room to change out of the restricting dress.




The stew was thick and filling. The bread coarse but still warm. The ale not too sour…better than what most of the taverns in this area sold…of course it was more expensive for that same reason. Branwen and Corbin said nothing as they ate. Branwen knew that Corbin was sceptical about her plan but it was worth a try. A commotion outside interrupted Branwen's train of thought and it seemed that Corbin was distracted from his own thoughts as well. The two of them stood and pushed open the window to get a look outside. The last of the sun was about to vanish beyond the horizon. As they looked out it seemed that a wagon and a carriage had nearly collided on the street. What a carriage like that was doing in an area of town like this one was beyond the brother and sister but still they watched curious. Shouting commenced and it seemed, unnoticed by the driver of the carriage and the unknown passenger, a figure was sneaking around the side of the wagon. The brother and sister exchanged glances and grinned. Another of the quarter's tradesmen at work or so it seemed. Not quite as clever and quick as them though for a shout went up. Several more sashes were thrown up at the sound. Suddenly with a whirring of wings the air seemed to fill with the croaking of ravens. Corbin drew back from the window as if struck. Branwen also felt as if the world again lurched sideways though not as seriously. She drew back and slammed down the sash. Her brother had dropped down onto the bed and had his head in his hands.


"What in the world is going on?" he groaned, "first you now me…if it hadn't happened before I would have thought it was the food." Branwen dropped into the chair again. There seemed to be no other disturbances. Everything was quiet.


"I think it is only us," she told her brother.


"What does that mean?" he looked up and she had to suppress a smile at his bewildered expression. He looked like a little boy when he did that…though he wasn't much more than that really. He could still pass as a page in the citadel if he wanted to but that was always a last resort.


"I don't know what it means. Maybe nothing. Maybe everything. Maybe something has changed…or is coming…or is about to happen…we must be on our toes, little brother. We must be prepared for it if something happens."
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Comments: 30

AsgardsGuardian [2010-12-01 09:35:27 +0000 UTC]

I'd say that out of all the excepts, Branwen and Corbin were the most interesting. You had a pretty fair balance of showing and telling in that except which helped me to get a clear picture of their personalities , in my humble opinion.

This is not to say that the other sections/characters were not interesting in their own right, but the ravens caught and held my attention straight away.

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SnowRaven-Moonstar In reply to AsgardsGuardian [2010-12-01 22:56:39 +0000 UTC]

thanks so much for the comment, deary-dear. Yes, the ravens are kind of my favourite too. I was concerned it was too long but I think the writing flowed the easiest of all of them except maybe Bella who I think is the other that I'm most happiest with. glad to hear from you again. I hope you are well.

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AsgardsGuardian In reply to SnowRaven-Moonstar [2010-12-02 11:17:36 +0000 UTC]

You are most welcome.

Too long? Hm...it didn't feel that way to me. If anything, some of your excerpts are too short! Micah's in particular but I've read the comments above and I realize you've been told that enough. xD

I appreciate your concern, by the way. I am in a bit of a better place. For now.

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SnowRaven-Moonstar In reply to AsgardsGuardian [2011-02-25 21:16:22 +0000 UTC]

this is a long time in being replied to but I thought I'd better. I think I was a little stuck with Micah. I kind of wanted the animal that is the symbol of each traveller and the moon to be tied in some how but I wasnt' sure how to make Micah's longer. I will probably go back and work on them further if I decidee to do anything with them in the long run though. Some had be stuck pretty well though.

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DormantMalevolence [2010-11-29 12:32:29 +0000 UTC]

WHAT

THE

HECK!?


Why didn't you tell me you put something new on DA. WHY!?

I'll read it tomorrow and comment when I have some more time, I swear!

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SnowRaven-Moonstar In reply to DormantMalevolence [2010-11-30 23:18:02 +0000 UTC]

I didn't even think of it. Sorry, guy. Well I hope you enjoy reading. I'll talk to you later maybe. cheerses.

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Br0wnnie [2010-11-16 15:53:08 +0000 UTC]

The Ravens, the Wolf, and the Serpent were the most interesting characters, although, i'd have preferred more detail for Micah. The spider was somewhat confusing because I couldn't quite visualize anything while reading it. Needed a bit more fleshing...the conversation with the elders would've been nice. or you could've slipped in the basic result of the conversation, somehow. I actually liked how you wrote the Serpent's piece. It's short, but isn't vague.

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SnowRaven-Moonstar In reply to Br0wnnie [2010-11-20 00:42:38 +0000 UTC]

Yeah...I'm not sure if I will ever use this or not. The Travellers tease me more than anything. The ideas come in spits and spats on occasion. I couldnt' get the conversation between ADria and the elders right and I couldn't visualize it properly even in my head. I couldn't get it down without a lot of exposition on the part of the elderes and I wanted something other than that. I didn't want it to be another scene of: "you must accept your destiny". Adria is really the only one who can be considered "chosen" and even then I don't want to go that way. For the rest it's a matter of being in the right place at the right time (or wrong time if you consider they have to leave what they know... ) So yeah...it's tricky. I've been having trouble with any sort of scene like that and making it fresh rather than feeling contrived or derivative. *sigh*

I hae developed a strong affection for Bella already even though I haven't written much for her. I think it's because Bella Rose is one of the more complex characters. She essentually has three personas (though all conscious and two of them adopted...she's doesbt' have alternate personalities or anything. ) I think she's going to be fun to play with. I can even almost imagine writing an entire story for Bella alone before she joins the Travellers. I'm still working out a lot of the details of the story though so it's going to take time. I've been thinking of starting with each character's "origin story" as it were...how they came to join Adria since they are in fact all from disperate realms...not just different countries but other worlds along the web so...there's a lot of room to play.

The Ravens are fun to write...I wanted characters that were somewhat wrapped up in each other and somewhat more troublesom than they could be worth. Again, charaders that ciould be fun to play with. Micah is difficult. I actually intended him to be from this world itself but i'm still working out how.

Actually it all still needs a gret deal of work no doubt. You've given me a great deal to think about though. And as always I apprecate it.

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Br0wnnie In reply to SnowRaven-Moonstar [2010-11-21 15:58:08 +0000 UTC]

You could make it more of a 'duty' than a 'destiny'. Might take some of the cliche cheesiness out of the conversation. Or you could slip in the details of the conversation with the elders as little flashbacks.

The origin story idea sounds nice. Might even help develop the characters more so that the travellers story feels more natural to you.

Micah actually sounds like he'd be fun to write. Mostly because i suppose he'd be more relate-able and would be a bit of the oddball considering how everyone else comes from these almost mystical worlds and his just feels not that mystical.

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SnowRaven-Moonstar In reply to Br0wnnie [2010-11-24 23:56:23 +0000 UTC]

That was part of what I thought. Maybe that the Spider is the one individual that is "chosen" but that they are chosen by the elders of her people rather than by destiny and all that silliness. Maybe the elders or a soothsayer or that sort of thing has the ability to see the signs that it is time for the Spider to be called. Ah...there are always possibilities.

Yeah...that was part of what I thought. I wanted this world to be involved though...perhaps in part to have a relatable character and the sort of adventure that many imagine but can never embark on. I wanted each world to be different. I kind of imagine Bella's to be somewhat steampunkish at times but I havce never written that and dont' know much about it so I might have some kind of technology but run by magic or who knows...I just want each world to have certain aspects that differ from the others...hmm...decisions decisions.

I love it when you offer your input. I need to get back on reading all those writings I've saved for later. I'm behind as always.

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Br0wnnie In reply to SnowRaven-Moonstar [2010-12-25 13:10:26 +0000 UTC]

The spider being the only one who understands her 'destiny' would make for interesting dynamics when and if the rest of them meet up her.

And you don't really need to know too much when you're writing fiction. That's the best part. Just make up the world however you want and don't worry about how you'd categorize it.

And it's Ok. Take your time.

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SnowRaven-Moonstar In reply to Br0wnnie [2011-02-25 21:14:30 +0000 UTC]

I havne't talekd to you in a while...i keep neglecting my DA "mailbox". I hope you are well. i just wanted to say hello.

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Br0wnnie In reply to SnowRaven-Moonstar [2011-03-20 15:02:15 +0000 UTC]

LOL. Hey. Yeah, it's been a while. So, how are you?

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SnowRaven-Moonstar In reply to Br0wnnie [2011-03-28 20:52:35 +0000 UTC]

I'm well. Working at a bookstore...back taking classes for my diploma...finally. how 'bout yourself.

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Br0wnnie In reply to SnowRaven-Moonstar [2011-04-16 20:45:38 +0000 UTC]

I'm fine. Been overworked but managed a few excerpts. Might end up posting them, if I get around to editing them. What's going on with you?

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SnowRaven-Moonstar In reply to Br0wnnie [2011-04-18 23:21:49 +0000 UTC]

Nothing terribly interesting is going on. If you've read my other comment already then you know I just finished a week long class learning about Cultural Landscapes and how to determine their value. I'm still working at that bookstore I mentioned before as well. I like it there but it isn't a hugely lucrative line of work...but that's retail for you. Still the people ar3e great and it does allow me to get an idea of what genres are popular and what it is about those genres that are popular which helps me think about what I might like to write...though getting anythign down still seems a challenge for me for some reason. I can spend hours thinking about ideas but I cvan't actualluy make myself sit and write. it's aggravating. Oh well...not sure what else to say. it's good to hear frm you again...I'm out of touch with half the people I know...bleh...

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Br0wnnie In reply to SnowRaven-Moonstar [2011-07-24 11:23:10 +0000 UTC]

That's nice. At least you get to snoop through books without it being labeled as "a waste of time" by anyone. And just working on an idea can be good too. The writing part will probably come eventually.

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SnowRaven-Moonstar In reply to Br0wnnie [2011-07-24 23:38:16 +0000 UTC]

yeah...it was nice while it lasted. About two months ago I got laid off. Bookstores can't adjust their prices to make up for loss of revenue like other retail stores and the province I live in is incrementally increasing minimum wage so...yeah...hours got cut and I got dropped. I'm working now at another retail store...but what I really mean to do is finish my classes and see about getting a job in a museum. Also not a terribly lucrative line of work since most museums are not-for-profit organizations but that's what I'm wanting to do.

I am writing a bit more now. I started a couple blogs, one of them a writing journal. So far it's helping me some but I'm still not writing as much as I'd like to be. ah well...we do what we can.

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Br0wnnie In reply to SnowRaven-Moonstar [2011-09-01 14:28:34 +0000 UTC]

Awww..that's sad. But hopefully you'll end up doing whatever you really want to in the end.

And I guess that doesn't matter - as long as you ARE getting some writing done. Eventually, you'll speed up. The more you write about a specific character, the more it ends up developing it's personality and the story becomes easier to narrate.....or at least that's what i feel.

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SnowRaven-Moonstar In reply to Br0wnnie [2011-09-01 20:37:04 +0000 UTC]

It wasn't the end of the world. it wasn't what I was meaning to do for the rest of my life anyway. So far I'm enjoying my new job though I'm getting transferred to another store. Ah well...I'm starting an online class soon as well...so...yeah. I have been toying with the idea of looking into what it woudl take to become an art dealer or art agent...but that's still something I have to research and figure out how to start.

I joined a workshopping group here on DA fairly recently and so far it's great. i'm getting a fair bit more writing done and the feedback is great. Also, having people to talk about writing with in detail and bounce ideas off of is great as well. I'm hoping to focus on a couple of stories that need fleshign out so..yeah...it's great.

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Br0wnnie In reply to SnowRaven-Moonstar [2011-10-01 03:29:33 +0000 UTC]

That's great to hear. Hopefully, I'll manage to churn out some stuff too. Got a little time off.

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KarrinGray [2010-11-02 17:16:29 +0000 UTC]

Were you intending to have each of these introductions in your story? Or are they more of a character workup for your purposes? After reading them I feel many were repetitive. It might be a good idea to pick one or two main characters and have the rest join in as the story progresses and they meet? Then they can all relate how they all noticed the strange moon etc. That said, I found the Ravens tale very interesting! I agree with Spider needing that talk with the elders to flesh her story out more.

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SnowRaven-Moonstar In reply to KarrinGray [2010-11-02 19:31:10 +0000 UTC]

actually I was intending to have them all join possibly in their own individual stories. It is meant to be repetative though. The moon and the animals are indication that the Spider has been Called and that the others will eventually follow. Since each traveller is associated with a different animal I wanted to use the animals themsleves to indicate which creature that particual individual was associated with.

I might not use this though because it gives a sense that all the other characters are destined to follow but in reality each Inner World within the Web can have numerous potentials. To give that sense though would be far too complicated and since these are the ones who would be Called due to the chance meeting with Adria it would be too confusing to show the sense from the POV of every possible individual. I thought of using it as a sort of prologue but might just dive right into the first story which would probably be the meeting of the Spider and Fox with the Wolf and have the joining of Spider and Fox as a prologue since there is no reason to write a whole story for them which would be made clear in the prologue itself.

Bleh, I'm rambling too much. I would like to write the meeting with Adria and the Elders but I couldn't get it right. I can't just have them say "Girl, you're the Traveller/Spider," but at the same time I couldn't figure out how to have them break it to her gently. It kept coming out wrong.

I'm glad you liked the Ravens. I'm starting to think that it's a split between Branwen and Corbin and Bella as my favourites. Of course you only get a sense of Bella in this and much of that sense is that she's not such a nice person... I don't know, I'm fond of her for some reason.

Thanks for commenting. You've given me something to think about. I have a lot of bits and pieces for this but I'm still working out a lot of kinks.

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KarrinGray In reply to SnowRaven-Moonstar [2010-11-04 14:03:31 +0000 UTC]

I liked snake too! I read this in chunks (busy, busy) and so it had been a day or so since reading her part. Her character and back story seem very interesting.

I see what you mean with breaking it up. It makes sense as separate stories/books, but all in one prologue it tends to get too repetitive.

The conversation with the elders does seem like it would be difficult to pull off well. I recall the fairytale you wrote as a premise to the tale, maybe they could start off by telling her that? It might be a gentle way of breaking it to her - telling her children stories, lol.

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SnowRaven-Moonstar In reply to KarrinGray [2010-11-04 22:41:21 +0000 UTC]

thanks for your reply. I have a curious soft spot for Bella Rose though I'm not fully sure what it is about her that I like. I think part of it is that she's different from many of my characters in that while she has a softness to her that she also has something of a dark side. Maybe it's just her name though I'm not entirely where the name came from. It just kind of came out of the blue one day.

Yes, I always intended to break the stories up, especially since each of teh charactres has their own life and even their own world. For the most part Adria would have to walk the Web in order just to cross paths with them so several stories make sense in the long run. Maybe what I might do is instead of having them all together I'll start each story (be they each in their own book or just their own parts within the story) with the introduction. Perhaps it could be the indication that the Spider has crossed into their world from the Web or something. *shrug* It might make more sense for that rather than the simple Call. Hmm...it's a thought.

Including the fairy tale/verse that I originally played with might work. I do imagine that among Adria's people if nothing else that they would all be familiar with it. It's something to think about. There are a lot of details I'm still playing with and working out. They definitely need a greater goal and while different possibilities have presented themselves to me I'm not sure which to go with. Ah well...

thanks again for your comments and reply I appreciate it so much and hope to hear from you again. take care.

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KarrinGray In reply to SnowRaven-Moonstar [2010-11-05 14:16:07 +0000 UTC]

There is something intriguing about someone with a dark side. They certainly are fun to read/write about.

There are many good possibilities with this idea. It's always difficult getting a story in order. I look forward to more. I was still hooked from the fairytale you posted awhile back. It is a great hook. You might not even need any prologue but that!

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SnowRaven-Moonstar In reply to KarrinGray [2010-11-07 03:55:07 +0000 UTC]

It's true. Most people do have a dark side and it certainly makes for a more compelling character if they have to struggle than if they are perfect and kind and good all the time. I always find those kinds of characters more compelling. But what is a story without a decent struggle and conflict. That's probably why I am so fond of Bella...because there are these two sides of her. I had an idea of what sort of person she would be, but I think it goes much deeper than I originally imagined. But that is good. I always like it when my characters surprise me.

I have wanted to include the fairy tale somewhere in the story. I really thought it would either make a good prologue or at least the verse be included in each volume assuming there would end up being more than one. There is still a lot to work out. Sadly the idea is not as fleshed out as in other stories I've been working on.

Tehre are so many possibilities with this but I do need to figure out a greater plan. There is so much to be fleshed out still. I know it's something I will never want to abandon though. The idea of the Web of Worlds is too compelling to me for me to abandon it.

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KarrinGray In reply to SnowRaven-Moonstar [2010-11-07 15:38:22 +0000 UTC]

It sounds like a really ambitious project! It will be interesting to see how everything develops.

I agree, perfectly good people are rather boring and unrealistic. Even the best of us have our bad days.

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SnowRaven-Moonstar In reply to KarrinGray [2010-11-07 19:54:16 +0000 UTC]

I think all my projects end up being more ambitious than I imagined to begin with. I think I'm just ahead of the game with this one in realizing how much work I still have to do with this one. I hope that things develop with a similar speed of my other ideas. I want to really get to work on this...though I should stop dividing my focus. bleh...oh well.

It's true. No one is perfect in real life and to be realistic characters need to be that way too. Though I have this wierd "relationship" with my characters in that they feel like real people to me that I'm getting to know. There are a lot of things I don't know when I start and sometimes it's almost as if they're sharing parts of their story and history with me as I write. I've had weird unexpected things happen all the time that I never intended. In one story I have a potential love triangle that was never meant to occur. One of the characters just ended up surprising me. And then I realized later on that neither guy in that triangle is even going to get the girl...bleh...I wonder how many readers will be upset by that. lol I try not to think about that stuff of course. I try to write mainly for me or else I spend all my time worrying about how others will react and really...one cannot write to please the readers otherwise the story just ends up one compromised after another and teh story ends up a big tangled mess.

(wow, didn't mean to go off on that tangent. My appologies)

Anyway, what I started out to say was that when I write I mostly think of my characters as actual people, perhaps even people that exist in some other reality that I'm writing about. When I think of it that way then it better allows me to think of my characters as people with faults and foibles and hopefully they end up being more realistic. I have read more than one novel in which the main character kind of didn't really make sense or was just too good, too talented, too everything and I simply couldnt' quite suspend belief...and that really is the death of a good story imo. yeah characters need to be people, the writer and the reader both need to see them as people or the story just doesn't work.

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KarrinGray In reply to SnowRaven-Moonstar [2010-11-09 18:19:47 +0000 UTC]

I do the same thing when I write. I tend to think of my characters as someone I'm getting to know. They have their personalities and a bit of intial history, some idea of what is supposed to happen and then they just kind of take over and write the story themselves.

I think some authors do get caught up in the idea of a perfect character, and in order to keep them that way they end up really one-dimensional, because you can't really write perfect. It falls apart.

I like the underdog too. Someone who isn't superman (another version of 'perfect'), but somehow makes an impact anyway. No one can be great at everything. It drives me nuts in movies too!

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