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surferxrosa — for granted
Published: 2003-11-01 18:31:17 +0000 UTC; Views: 79; Favourites: 1; Downloads: 15
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Description if i wake up next
to you again, complaining
at your morning breath,

remind me that things
don't smell in dreams, and that i'll
soon awake, alone.
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Comments: 7

tragicrabbit [2004-01-25 17:04:28 +0000 UTC]

you use the haiku well, i like the experimental ways you use them ^__^ great read

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

benevolentsoul [2003-11-05 08:26:53 +0000 UTC]

soon awake, alone.

Wouldn't it be 'soon wake'? I know it messes up your syllable count, but it makes it a lot smoother.

- Keegan

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

livingbyair [2003-11-05 04:50:50 +0000 UTC]

well put. there's nothing else to say.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

TheHeat4x20 [2003-11-04 18:26:50 +0000 UTC]

jon titor loves haikus, so does the heat

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

corruptedangel [2003-11-03 17:06:48 +0000 UTC]

Smelly breath maybe or longing to be? Or both? I love interpreting your haikus! lol. But yeah.. the longing to be in a situation where you will enver be and more than that.. where you are comfortable andwill notice room for improvement. But it will never happen. Shame.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

jraub [2003-11-03 16:46:42 +0000 UTC]

That's it, you grabbed me. I love you inventive use of haiku. Oh, and by the way...FAV.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Guitarsinger [2003-11-02 04:30:09 +0000 UTC]

Ohhh!! This one I REALLY like *not that I did not like the others, just this one best*

It is rather deep, yet imensly funny, with several meanings. That is a rare find--well, it has been hard for me to come by for me so far, but I may have jsut been reading the wrong stuff all this time...

👍: 0 ⏩: 0