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Description
What Happened, Chapter Four: In Which it Ends

When we last left our heroes, Gamzee was motherfuckin' spacin' out 'n shit!

"Gamzee," a voice hissed. Gamzee began to pull himself out of his largely rainbow-themed dreams and slowly refocused in front of him, but found his vision blocked by an extremely angry Karkat not inches away.

"Woah, what the motherfuck is up, my motherfuckin' motherfucker?"

"Gamzee. What. The hell. Happened?"

"Well..."

Karkat let go of Gamzee's shirt and the Capricorn fell on his back. "No. Fuck that. What I find to be more pressing is the current state of the living room, or how about how some of Equius's stupid fucking robots are taking apart someone's house, or, oh! I know! How about the fact that my fucking block is on fire." He wandered into the kitchen to get a better look at the carnage. "And what the sweet steaming fuck happened in here? Why is Feferi in the sink?"

Feferi was still, indeed, where she had been hours prior, only slumped over and obviously unconscious. She probably wasn't breathing.

"Fuck, man, I don't know." Gamzee tottered into the kitchen with Karkat. "That dude across the street asked me to motherfuckin' babysit his grub and Equiusbot did some shit, and Neighbor Phil was here, and..." He trailed off. "Hey, man, your block is on fire."

"Fuuuuck!" Karkat ran up the stairs, as if just realizing this. "What the bulgesniffing fuck is Equiusbot doing in here?"

Sollux entered through the lack of a front door. "Woah. What the hell happened here?"

"I was just trying to explain to my motherfucker Karkat, and-"

Nepeta bounded in, the rest of the grocery crew behind her, carrying whatever deli products they had salvaged. "Wow!" She skidded to a halt. "Why is everything in a mess? Why is Feferi in the sink?"

"Equius!" Karkat descended the stairs in a divine fury. "Tell me, in all your grand highblood wisdom, why your fucking robots made a mess out of this goddamn hive!"

The best Equius could come up with was a shrug.

Kanaya walked in, holding half of Rufio. "Tavros, your fiduspawn attacked Neighbor Phil."

"Aww, not again. Where's the, uh, other half?"

"He ate it."

"Oh."

"Karkat, your block is on fire."

"Gogdammit, Aradia, I kno- Kanaya what are you doing?"

Kanaya looked up from her phone. "Calling the fire and police departments. It is only logical in a situation where the hive is on fire and-"

"You don't get it! We are wanted by the police for vandalizing Walmart and we probably killed a guy in a shopping cart related explosion!"

"Area City Police Department, how can I help you?"

"Oh. Well. Fuck."

------

From police report 359666, Filed May 11th, 2011:
"Claimants from house 2422 Fig Drive are suspected in the various charges of theft, assault, destruction of private property, and vandalism at the following locations: Walmart 6279, 2423 Fig Drive, 2428 Fig Drive. Suspect Karkat Vantas was apprehended when trying to take out insurance claims on suspect's vehicle and home.

Suspect/claimant is displeased to find home insurance does not cover 'extensive [...] robot damage.'"

Description
What Happened, Chapter Four: In Which it Ends

When we last left our heroes, Gamzee was motherfuckin' spacin' out 'n shit!

"Gamzee," a voice hissed. Gamzee began to pull himself out of his largely rainbow-themed dreams and slowly refocused in front of him, but found his vision blocked by an extremely angry Karkat not inches away.

"Woah, what the motherfuck is up, my motherfuckin' motherfucker?"

"Gamzee. What. The hell. Happened?"

"Well..."

Karkat let go of Gamzee's shirt and the Capricorn fell on his back. "No. Fuck that. What I find to be more pressing is the current state of the living room, or how about how some of Equius's stupid fucking robots are taking apart someone's house, or, oh! I know! How about the fact that my fucking block is on fire." He wandered into the kitchen to get a better look at the carnage. "And what the sweet steaming fuck happened in here? Why is Feferi in the sink?"

Feferi was still, indeed, where she had been hours prior, only slumped over and obviously unconscious. She probably wasn't breathing.

"Fuck, man, I don't know." Gamzee tottered into the kitchen with Karkat. "That dude across the street asked me to motherfuckin' babysit his grub and Equiusbot did some shit, and Neighbor Phil was here, and..." He trailed off. "Hey, man, your block is on fire."

"Fuuuuck!" Karkat ran up the stairs, as if just realizing this. "What the bulgesniffing fuck is Equiusbot doing in here?"

Sollux entered through the lack of a front door. "Woah. What the hell happened here?"

"I was just trying to explain to my motherfucker Karkat, and-"

Nepeta bounded in, the rest of the grocery crew behind her, carrying whatever deli products they had salvaged. "Wow!" She skidded to a halt. "Why is everything in a mess? Why is Feferi in the sink?"

"Equius!" Karkat descended the stairs in a divine fury. "Tell me, in all your grand highblood wisdom, why your fucking robots made a mess out of this goddamn hive!"

The best Equius could come up with was a shrug.

Kanaya walked in, holding half of Rufio. "Tavros, your fiduspawn attacked Neighbor Phil."

"Aww, not again. Where's the, uh, other half?"

"He ate it."

"Oh."

"Karkat, your block is on fire."

"Gogdammit, Aradia, I kno- Kanaya what are you doing?"

Kanaya looked up from her phone. "Calling the fire and police departments. It is only logical in a situation where the hive is on fire and-"

"You don't get it! We are wanted by the police for vandalizing Walmart and we probably killed a guy in a shopping cart related explosion!"

"Area City Police Department, how can I help you?"

"Oh. Well. Fuck."

------

From police report 359666, Filed May 11th, 2011:
"Claimants from house 2422 Fig Drive are suspected in the various charges of theft, assault, destruction of private property, and vandalism at the following locations: Walmart 6279, 2423 Fig Drive, 2428 Fig Drive. Suspect Karkat Vantas was apprehended when trying to take out insurance claims on suspect's vehicle and home.

Suspect/claimant is displeased to find home insurance does not cover 'extensive [...] robot damage.'"