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Description
I drew this 3 weeks ago and wrote this with it:

I’m exposed. It’s a good feeling honestly.

Some days I feel bad about it. Before people just knew me as a happy cool sorta girl. Now I’m a happy cool sorta girl with a more common than we thought mental disease. (Which I misspell occasionally as “metal disease” which sounds badass.)

I spent years keeping it secret to only one or two people until 2012 when it got bad and I was arrested and sent to a hospital for a night. The experience of just that hospital kept things at bay and bit and I was treated and put on medication. Few friends knew about what happened and why.

Flash forward 2 years and it got bad again. A lot of you know about it already, so I wont get too into it. Being on and off my meds paired with mistrust, attempted social alienation and feeling alone in a situation where I needed certainty. I’m still bitter and October will be rough, but when that moment happens and it’s dark no amount of love and friendship can penetrate. It’s the one that most people know about.

And it left me exposed.

At Otakon when I seen old friends again it was happy reunions, but I also got that feeling that can be described as “Hello again, I’m so glad you are not dead.” I felt guilty at first, but I knew it’s because of love and I appreciated it a lot.

With the passing of Robin Williams the topic came to the forefront again and the surprise that anyone, the ones you didn’t think, could be suffering inside. It’s a shock I dealt with twice in my personal life so far. Being on either side is a horrible thing.

Back to being exposed, well, I know I have friends who are there for and others who been through or going through what I have. Some who are survivors and some who mourn those that haven’t. I’m left exposed in the way that I can share what’s wrong without having to fear, and that has helped me a lot. Yeah, I know I may get annoying about it, but I think sharing has helped a lot. It’s not weak. It’s hard. It’s really damn hard to tell someone “Help, I want to die.”

One day, the demons may win. I’m not going to lie and say it’s out of the realm of probability. It could be a day I ran out of meds and my BFFs got hit by a meteor, my boyfriend dumps me, I get an F, My enemy kills my cat, the Earth implodes and we ran out of milk for my oatmeal. But right now, I’m alive and want to stay that way for a long time.

Next time on 20 Minute Comics; Immortality and Robots: Who will win a hockey game.

Description
I drew this 3 weeks ago and wrote this with it:

I’m exposed. It’s a good feeling honestly.

Some days I feel bad about it. Before people just knew me as a happy cool sorta girl. Now I’m a happy cool sorta girl with a more common than we thought mental disease. (Which I misspell occasionally as “metal disease” which sounds badass.)

I spent years keeping it secret to only one or two people until 2012 when it got bad and I was arrested and sent to a hospital for a night. The experience of just that hospital kept things at bay and bit and I was treated and put on medication. Few friends knew about what happened and why.

Flash forward 2 years and it got bad again. A lot of you know about it already, so I wont get too into it. Being on and off my meds paired with mistrust, attempted social alienation and feeling alone in a situation where I needed certainty. I’m still bitter and October will be rough, but when that moment happens and it’s dark no amount of love and friendship can penetrate. It’s the one that most people know about.

And it left me exposed.

At Otakon when I seen old friends again it was happy reunions, but I also got that feeling that can be described as “Hello again, I’m so glad you are not dead.” I felt guilty at first, but I knew it’s because of love and I appreciated it a lot.

With the passing of Robin Williams the topic came to the forefront again and the surprise that anyone, the ones you didn’t think, could be suffering inside. It’s a shock I dealt with twice in my personal life so far. Being on either side is a horrible thing.

Back to being exposed, well, I know I have friends who are there for and others who been through or going through what I have. Some who are survivors and some who mourn those that haven’t. I’m left exposed in the way that I can share what’s wrong without having to fear, and that has helped me a lot. Yeah, I know I may get annoying about it, but I think sharing has helped a lot. It’s not weak. It’s hard. It’s really damn hard to tell someone “Help, I want to die.”

One day, the demons may win. I’m not going to lie and say it’s out of the realm of probability. It could be a day I ran out of meds and my BFFs got hit by a meteor, my boyfriend dumps me, I get an F, My enemy kills my cat, the Earth implodes and we ran out of milk for my oatmeal. But right now, I’m alive and want to stay that way for a long time.

Next time on 20 Minute Comics; Immortality and Robots: Who will win a hockey game.