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HelevornArt β Yngvar: Fear
#angst #blood #childhood #dread #fear #horror #macabre #medieval #memory #middleages #murder #nightmare #norse #originalcharacter #trauma #viking #octraining #berserker
Published: 2018-04-16 19:24:16 +0000 UTC; Views: 807; Favourites: 16; Downloads: 0
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~ Yngvar: Fear ~Now! her glance commands, as she distances herself from the man. I raise the axe, my fists strained around the hilt, ready, ready to strike, I'm ready. Until... he turns. He turns, his eyes looking into mine, he does not see my axe glimmer in the shade - I know he doesn't, for his gaze is... mild. A moment only, my breath quivers, my palms sweat around the hilt. Yngvar, now! she pleads, this time out loud, shoving him towards me. I strike.
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For this task of OC-Training, I chose to illustrate a moment when Yngvar was afraid in his life: the first time he took someone's life. This happened when he was 11.
The first moment of dread for Yngvar was when his father was killed; he was there when it happened.
Yngvar's mother, who loved her husband very much, becomes obsessed with avenging him and involves Yngvar in her plan: she brings the supposed murderer to their house, seduces him, and has Yngvar kill him. Yngvar is angry himself about his father's death, so he is eager to take part in his mother's plan, imagining his father would want it. Besides, he has long been curious to see what it's like to take the life of a person (he's only killed animals before). But when the man turns to look in his eyes, he has a moment of panic, which is illustrated here.
He feels no guilt afterwards, and he and his mother go after the man's "accomplices" in a similar manner. The greater blow to Yngvar comes when he learns, not long after a series of such dreadful things, that those men were not guilty. Instead, it had only been his mother's grief and paranoia that had gone too far...
He now resents his mother for everything she put him through, believing that it's her fault that he is a "monster". More about her here:
I might have cheated a bit since this shows trauma, not exactly his greatest fear. There is at least one moment in his adulthood when he feels fear, and it is shown in my novel, but it contains spoilers so I chose not to refer to it. In case you wonder how he copes with that: a berserker rage... 
More about his anger in the "Anger" task 
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Comments: 47
Ahhhh so now the story with his mother becomes ever clearer. I can empathise how he'd be feeling, and that moment of hesitation, what with realising that the poor guy doesn't even know he's about to die. I love the way you've presented this, with the splatters, the axe blade, and the grey and white memories contrasting to his present self.
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Thank you for the great comment!! I'm really pleased when the training helps me enrich the story, like it did in this case (other times I either repeat stuff that I've already mentioned in the novel or stories, or come up with silly stuff for the sake f the training that don't really fit in the story, and that's certainly not as satisfying).
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No problem! That's cool. So in these cases do you develop deeper because of the training, or is it already fully developed and this just helps you get the ideas out?
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The training makes me brainstorm more, sometimes it's aspects that I hadn't thought about in much detail. With Yngvar's mother, I knew she was a half-Sami witch who made Yngvar kill some people when he was young, but I didn't know how or why she did that exactly (and I had no idea how she looked).
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That's one sick mum he has... Poor Yngvar Β .
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No wonder he turned out like this 
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Wow the composition of this piece is incredible! You did such a great job of combining elements to really capture the traumatic event and what it is like to remember it. Nice job!
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Thank you so very much! I'm glad you like how I pieced these together. I wanted to show multiple scenes without making it look like a comic page, so I found this workaround.
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Okay, this guy is traumatized for life. No need to explain any of his creepiness whatsoever anymore
It makes sense he'd escape into berserk in order not to confront his fear, as there was little prospect for trauma therapy up until 20th century. 
And honestly, I didn't expect Valdis to be such a nasty bitch 
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Thanks a lot for the great comment and insight! I'm happy you feel that way about how realistic they are, it means a lot!
Definitely! I don't think Valdis realized she was doing something wrong, she wanted to make a man out of him, give him responsibilities. 11 years old back then was different from 11 nowadays, so I guess she thought that avenging his father was a suitable activity for that age 
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It's cool to get to learn a bit about his backstory here and the first steps that led him to become the way he is today.
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Thank you very much!
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This is such an interesting piece and explains so much of Yngvar's backstory and why he is the way he is. His relationship with his mother sounds very complicated indeed. I love the contrast between the grey tones and the colour in the foreground, suggesting memories and the past vs. the present.
I've almost finished the picture of him btw so I hope to upload it tonight
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Thank you very much! I'm glad you like the story behind it, especially since I might enroll his mother in the next training round, so there will be more about her this autumn.
Oh woow that's so exciting! I can't wait to see it!!!
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Ah wow, the good ole Icelandic way of getting revenge! Β I bet that it would be horrifying, even to a psychopathic kid, to discover that he murdered innocent people! Β His mother sounds pretty twisted, making her child do the dirty work!
Β I'm glad that Yngvar does have some qualms of conscious! Β ^^
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Thank you for the wonderful comment!Β
Yes, definitely! I guess she didn't really consider him a child, she thought that 11 is old enough to avenge his father.
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This is amazing! You are very good at dipicting emotions! Sufferings, pain, disapointment... The shadows around his eyes, the convulsive neck, green colour (colour of disgust) - great way to express emotions. Face of his mother with blood spots...I like also her eyes - so much grief.... But mostly I`m impressed by Yngvar - wonderful facial expression! Great result!
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Thank you for the wonderful words, that's beautifully put! I'm glad you noticed all those details and that you like the effects. I enjoy depicting negative emotions especially in relation to Yngvar, I think they fit his character.
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Wow!! Stunning realization! I love how you used the colored pencils for make this artwork. Also the composition is good.
I believe kill a person it'sΒ unbearable for anyone. Ynvgar still think about that day.Β
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Β The sadistic writer in me is glad.
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Oh wow, this is so intense! I love how you drew the main figure of him in the left corner with the closed eyes, clearly remembering what happened and the black and white snippets of the events around him. And the greenish haze around him looks so good! And wow, that last part about his mother actually being delusional and attacking (and making Yngvar kill) men who were not guilty is really creepy! No wonder it traumatised Yngvar. Characters who blame their parents for how they are are quite interesting to me. (Actually among my characters, Chlodvig also used to blame his father for how he was; much of his young-adult life was trying to not be like his father wanted him to be.
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Thank you for the awesome comment! I'm really glad you like how the memory blends with his figure. And that you find the story behind it interesting! I don't have many parent/child relationships in my stories, only this one about Yngvar which is pretty dark and Aidan's issues with his parents (a happier one still since he was so close to Merwyn).
That's interesting! Does Chlodvig resent his father for his relationship with his mother? And in what way does he think he resembles him?
I'm thinking of enrolling Yngvar's mother in the next OC-Training. I don't know much about her myself and I'd like to discover more and hopefully write a story focusing on her relationship with her husband. A twisted and bloody love story, I suspect xD They might become my most loving couple, besides Helgi and Lars (since my other couples aren't the happiest)
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O.O' Oh man... Poor dude... I hope he can find happiness. Nobody fully recovers from something like that.
Awesome work!!! Keep at it.
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Thanks a lot! ^^
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Heh heh. Don't we terrible writers all do that at some point in time?
You're very welcome. Β
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Well... Trauma was a fear!
Ah... I really love how you draw Yngvar's expressions (it's very well done), he's not the one who show much but now we can see things more about him and that honestly interesting that he is feeling guilty to be that "monster"
Did he ever confront or questions his mother about this?
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Thank you very much! Emotion was certainly more visible in his face when he was a child (and more acutely felt) but yes, he does believe himself to bee a monster. Perhaps it's one of the very many reasons why he doesn't like being around people.
That's a good question, I haven't thought about it much. His mother killed herself not long afterwards. Yngvar becomes fully aware of the fact that they weren't guilty only after his mother's death, from his uncle, when he isn't under her influence any longer. But maybe he confronts her and this also pushes her to suicide? No idea, I need to think about it...
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I see then, so his uncle (paternal or maternal?) is the one who tell him truth. Ah... That must be such thunder shock for Yngvar... Maybe why now he doesn't "feel" anymore, still numb.
Take your time! And the fact his mom commit suicide not long afterwards, after doing what she thinks of correct and accomplishment; must be a strong cause.
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Paternal. His father's family never liked her much, thought she was a bad influence on her husband.
True, that's why I'm thinking it had to do with finding out they weren't the right guys, maybe learning that the "main guy" is out of reach (left the country/dead) so that she can't make a purpose out of killing him. So she tells Yngvar something vague and seems to be acting weird, and then he is told/finds that she has killed herself.
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I see thought, totally understandable. What if they find out what the shit she made Yngvar to put up with? What about his maternal family?
I was thinking "that main guy" is gonna be a big villain but nope. Well, if she unstable since the start it's really a believable thing that can lead to suicide.
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His uncle finds out and tries to comfort him, probably telling him that his mother was crazy but that she loved his father and him in her way. I don't know much about his mother's family though, I'm thinking she wasn't on good terms with them. I need to think about that though.
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Hmm... So Yngvar's mother is kind of an "outcast"? Maybe her being disliked so much have effect to her psyche.
What a nice good uncle! Uncles in fictions often are either cool or total asshole.
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Hmm perhaps... though I think she was very rebellious (and mean and manipulative), so that's why she isn't liked by her family or by other people much. But certainly she thinks she's right and all the others are wrong, so to her it seems like she's treated unfairly, which should have an effect on her psyche indeed.
Haha right, like: a. the guy that you can talk to openly (vs. parents who don't let you do stuff you like) and who buys you things or b. the guy who kills you father to take his fortune and marry his wife 
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Ah, so what you showed on IG was only part of this whole picture! This is stunning--I love the emotional feel here, the striking use of colour to show his emotions in the foreground (and the creepy use of green) and how he is always still fixated on his mother's influence. We see all the stuff he hates the most about her (the seduction of the men who killed her husband, supposedly) and how Yngvar was encouraged to kill the men. The look in young Yngvar's eyes is telling--he looks very uncertain, confused, and not sure what is going to happen next, rather than being purely cold as we usually associate him with.
Also, it's nice to see his tattoos again in more colour. They seem lighter here, for the purposes of composition so as to not draw attention away from the other parts of the picture?
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That's right! I'm happy you like how this turned out, I was pretty worried about the combination of colours because I hadn't used graphite in a while and I had forgotten how grey it is (I was going for more contrast, but I solved it in PS) xD But it's great that you noticed how I used warm colours for Yngvar to finally show his emotion! I think it's exactly because he gets emotional when remembering this that he never talks about it and tries to push the memory away.
Thank you for the awesome comment!
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It is particularly interesting since we rarely can sense or see him getting emotional about anything.Β
Also, how did Valdis die? I'm not sure if you told me before but I don't seem to remember...is it a huge spoiler?
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Actually, that's kind of a blur to me too. In my novel it's all in rumours, like all that's about Yngvar's past): 1. she killed herself after trying to bring her husband back to life through necromancy (resurrected dead are kind of zombies in Norse sagas, so not a good idea to make them) - rumour told by Mara, obviously unreliable; 2. she threw herself on his funeral pyre as he was being incinerated - rumour told by Yngvar's guard who wasn't there.
The truth will be different, at least in that she doesn't kill herself right away but first she tries to avenge him. Maybe she does it when finding out they weren't the right guys and the main killer is out of reach (like dead or out of the country)? And maybe she also thinks it's her fault that her husband was killed (she sort of instigated him to get into the fight with those men). No idea how she does it though.
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Ah, I see. There seems to be quite a number of rumours, making her story even more obscure. I wonder if you will only choose one set of rumours to explore when you enter Valdis into OC-training, or kind of touch upon all of the rumours whether they're unreliable or not?
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I think I'll mentioned the rest but choose one, unless it's something I don't want to be revealed.
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Oh wow. A very powerful way of showing this fear 
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Thank you very much!
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What a great combination of colors and greyscale! I like how you use crimson along with yelowish hues. Your palette natural feel adds to an effect of your well developed sense of relistical depiction.
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Thank you so much!! I'm glad you feel so, since it's a combination I haven't tried before (coloured foreground and greyscale background.
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